Arjuna Satria's School Of Thought

2009-03-21T23:34:00.005+08:00

25 Facts about Air Traffic Controller. (Extracted from Facebook group - Air Traffic Control.)

People often wonder about our job, well here are some facts to make it easier to understand:

1. The controller is never wrong. Even if he is, he is not.
2. When working in ATC long enough, you become a master at covering up your mistakes.
3. Pilots often act like little children who can't have their favorite toy.
4. A pilot who thinks decreases the flow of traffic.
5. Your neighbors usually think you are unemployed.
6. Sexy voices don't necessarily account for sexy pilots.
7. A good controller feels like he's getting paid a lotta money for nothing--a bad controller feels like he's totally underpaid for saving lives everyday.
8. A cockpit window offers a better overview of all airport traffic than your control tower.
9. The toughest working position in a tower is start up/clearance delivery--during runway closures! It feels like a daycare job. (See Nr. 3)
10. It never stops to amaze you what can go wrong.
11. If you go out of your way to make a flight meet his slot, the pilots usually thank each other for waiting.
12. The hardest part about your job is the drive home with so many idiots on the road who just don't see the picture.
13. Your favorite question becomes "Any reason for the delay?" The best response is "Controllers amusement" (Thanks for that one, Scott!)
14. Controllers are very responsible people-but only at work!
15. You're always the best controller working at the busiest airport.
16. The radar guys think airplanes disappear after handover.
17. Female controllers must be tough to survive in our world - or pretty.
18. Your colleagues always tease you. When they stop, something is seriously wrong with you.
19. Most controllers hate offices and paperwork--some controllers see them as a way out.
20. The last thing you can handle after a busy day is your wife talking back to you and there's no recording of who said what.
21. Sometimes you wonder where the pilots hide their "immediate take-off checklist".
22. When you're home, you don't think about work. When you do, start worrying!
23. "Runway vacated" is a very flexible term, depending on the airline.
24. The best part about nightshift is driving home when everybody is driving to work.
25. When you think you're the best--that's the time to start being careful!

lol. I so could relate to all of these. And it makes me proud to be part of this small group of people, 250 to be exact (in Singapore).

"ATCOs can only work within a band of confidence. Above the upper limit of this band, we are labelled ARROGANT, below the lower limit, we will not be able to work.

And this band of confidence is as thick as the paper strip."

2009-03-21T00:56:00.004+08:00

TGIF!

like finally. the week went from horrendous to average to crappy to average. very average Friday.

Simulator training throughout the week have been draining me. And when I actually went back to Changi Tower on on Thursday and Friday, I could'nt believe it. The traffic was much much slacker and laid back. And that they are pretty much spaced apart. Prolly the night Euro and Japanese traffic would be a killer but I'll have to wait and see.

The people in Alpha watch has been especially nice. I have a much clearer picture now and the light traffic only helps. In the simulator, maam would be hustling and bustling while aircrafts are calling non-stop. A military f50 requesting to cross runway, heli holding at Pulau Ubin to cross to Tekong, freaking trainer flights, request for take-off on the left, coordination with approach, and on top of that streams of arrivals coming through every 3-4 minutes, damn I'm swamped. All in a space of 15-30 minutes, with the maam yakking at the back ordering you around. Mistakes are bound to happen, procedures left out and thats when the day go down the drain. tsk tsk.

Happier times, while I still got the picture. Rwy West Controller.

The tower is a different ball game though. All the situation happening in the simulator within 15-30 minutes are prolly not gonna happen at the same time, 90% of the time. understood? ahh forget it I'm too lazy to explain.

Like I've said, its been a tiring week. Just enjoy the pictures and have a good weekend people. I just gotta write this crap outta my system. :D

South Cross.

Central Apron. North Crosses.

Wet wet Morning. Runway 20C.

2009-03-17T03:12:00.002+08:00

Shut up, i love my new blogskin.

god knows why i suddenly felt like blogging. its been downhill i guess. freaking downhill. work, crap, work, crap, more work, more crap.

its been too long since I've blogged and I think I've lost my sense of self-expression. Supressed, sinned and scorned.

After a whole week of attending dumb Human Factors course, I lost my touch/momentum while controlling. This is just the simulator. I can't imagine what kinda surprises awaits me at the tower, dealing with life traffic. Dealing with thousands of lives, millions of dollars worth of flying machines, on a daily basis.

I've been in shambles now to say the least. Grasping for something to hold on to. So I could pull myself up, get the "picture" back. Both work and love.

For every 1 step I take towards goodness, is like a bang against a stone wall. But of course, I only have myself to blame. And as a man, its only wise/macho to face it. And face it I shall. Endure it I must. For He never brought upon me tests which I can't handle.

Mo Cion Daonnan.

Only feel good factor of the day -

"You see, you can see the traffic better than any of your peers. Help them. Decide. Even the weakest can be the best if everyone does their part."

Learning to be a team at work. And to enjoy solitude of it. It will be a tough lesson.

Have a pleasant week, to anyone who still visit this dusty, run down place.

2008-12-22T23:22:00.003+08:00

Its been ages since I've wrote something here aint it. heh. some cina girl asked me to close it down, which I politely decline with a threat that i might bite her fair cina ass off and she obliged.

Ok, so lets review what you numbnuts have been missing. Since the last time I blogged, I've finally gotten a proper decent job. A decent one, I'd say. Though I've always been a lil dodgy about serving under the government, eventually I ended up as a civil servant.

20th October 2008, marked my first day on the job as a Probationary Air Traffic Control Officer with the local Civil Aviation Authority. Up to this date I've yet to complete the Primary Course.
2 more papers to go before I finally pass out and go all out on the practical training.

Stressful, fast paced and precise. Some of the words to describe the overall working environment. And we hold to 3 main motto - Safe, Orderly and Expeditious. And I'm destined to be working at Changi Tower. Approach stream - the toughest stream any ATC could be assigned to. Keeps getting better aint it.

Looking on the bright side, I'll be at Changi Airport most of the time, eye candies for the taking, straight bus service from home and the best part, I'll be ordering damn pilots around. : D And so I hope everything will go well in that department.

The missus have been drowning herself with production. Minimal time for me, and considering my exams and other factors, its been pretty hard to get a decent date from that lil munchkin of mine. And I hope she is coping as well. Hang in there ok darling. Though I have no freaking idea what production is all about I'll be there if you need a grab on the butt ok, love. I promise.

Just in case i dont find the time to blog again, Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year, you filthy animals.

gd day! :D

you.

2008-10-06T23:38:00.003+08:00

the thing is, i never stopped loving you.
and with God's will, i never will.
one four three.

2008-09-24T01:01:00.001+08:00

Wahai Juwitaku,
mengapa gundah-gulana hati hamba pagi ini..
Sejak fajar menyingsing, agak sukar untuk hamba melupakan kejadian di hari yg lepas..

Wahai Juwitaku,
Bagai telah terpaut hati beta, Juwita..
Sejak dikau menguntum senyuman, semakin mekar cinta dengan haruman..

Wahai Juwitaku,
Musykil hamba memikirkan,
Bagaimana hati yg liat ini dapat dilentur hanya dengan kuntuman senyumanmu,
Tersentuh kalbu ini tiap kali gugur linangan air mata duka mu..

Wahai Juwitaku,
Adakah Hamba di alam asmara?
Mustahil..Mustahil sepertimana mustahilnya bangkai gajah dikafankan dengan daun nipah..

Namun hamba pasrah akhirnya, kerna sekeras mana pun, hati yang ungkal ini,
Tunduk dan longlai dipukau keindahan parasmu, halus budi bicaramu dan bahang gejolak cintamu,
Wahai Juwitaku..

Arjuna Satria (180504)
---------------------------------------------------------

I've prepared a puke bucket at the corner for the convenience of those allergic to mushy stuff.

wrote this back in 2004 for the missus. i nearly forgot about it.

damn, these gave me goosebumps but i meant every single word.

thanks for the ride sweetheart.

we've been to hell and back again.

so to the best thing that ever happened to me,
Happy 7th to us.

"two against the world. forever."

2008-09-08T21:56:00.000+08:00

"Bro Tkcare man..All the best in everything you do...Life in camp is gonna be very boring without you man.. Thanks for the time bro.. Knew a good friend like you..: ) Tkcare..*salute*" - Julian Cinarep

That sms was this cina buddy of mine who speaks malay like a mat and goes like "Eh matrep. Amaaciaam?!" while dishing out some stupid handshake we made up, everytime I booked in.

That message sure made me smile, but I told him that nothing could make me extend my service nor sign on. lol.

And that was that. 2 years of bittersweet memories in that green uni, on the sunny island of Tekong.

Its nice to know once in a while, amidst the crazy training and busy schedule that i'll be missed. All the farewells and well wishes with those "I-dont-know-how'd-I'll-handle-stupid-army-without-an-idiotic-malay-friend-like-you" faces. Or prolly its the "omg-i-wanna-ord-now-also-please!" faces. I think its the latter. haha.

"Your time will come", i smirked while I walk towards the ferry, IC in hand, for one last time. I was indeed in the "pink of health". : )

and just now after maghrib, I went for a smoke break with abah and I broke to my old man the news that I was accepted for an engineering job that I've been hoping.

And he gave me a piece of his mind - "Gaji kecik takpe tapi mesti rajin usaha macam aku." And I smile and pondered as I stared into his sunken eyes and the lil wrinkles on his face after all those years of hard labour to bring up this scrawny lil kid.

And he goes on about how hard it was for an average man like him to make a living just with psle cert while i meddled with his wallet and right there, tears welled up in my eyes.

He still keeps a pic of me when i was prolly 2 or 3 years old in his wallet., "Abah simpan ni buat ape, orang dah besar la."

And he replied, straight faced, "Tu lah yg buat aku kerja kuat2, si kecik tu. Sekarang kau dah tak cute. Isap rokok depan aku lagi ader"

heh. I just smiled to myself. And deep down realise, no matter how meagre my achievements are, I know he's proud of me. And deep down I know, I'm still his cute lil "si kecik". : D wonders of being the only young man in the family. heh.

Good day, popsicles!

2008-09-01T05:26:00.002+08:00

and it was bliss all over again.

first, it was the cinamudpie's birthday celeb which got me into a baking frenzy after her baked cake was anonymously destroyed when someone opened the fridge and it dropped out magically i suppose. had to do some light jogging around the neighbourhood to get some of the ingredients as well as to open up the mixer all over again. and of course had to bake the cake all over again from scratch. i hope I've impressed her though. Well thats the whole point anyway, and to make her happy of course. : ) the thing about giving her a gift or baking her something is that megawatt, heart warming smile of hers that pulled my heartstring and THAT was priceless. I hope you loved it, sweetheart. : D

Secondly, Ramadhan is here again and I can't thank Him enough, that He actually keeps me breathing so I could see Ramadhan to redeem myself yet again, year after year. After all the sins I've done that is. I'll give it yet another shot, God. I promise. For You and for the good of myself and the people I love and mankind for that matter. Thank you, God. I love that positive vibe I got when Ramadhan is here. That tranquil feeling.

Thirdly, there's sweet sweet freedom I've been waiting for 2 years, thats finally here. Almost here, I suppose. My final week as a soldier. One last burst of fire and I can't wait for that too.

September have always been a busy month on my calendar. And I surely hope that this time, amidst Ramadhan, birthdays, anniversaries and ORD, God will give me rezki and open up opportunities for me to get a decent job, I could feed my family with and also to finance that beautiful wedding my a beautiful cinamudpie,

Have a meaningful Ramadhan, a great week and a smiley Monday people.

PS. i love you, suhaila said.

2008-07-19T23:59:00.000+08:00

ORD beckons.

one by one by fellow comrades collect their pink ICs, leaving for one last ferry ride as a military personnel.

i pondered some of the things these mofos might miss once they already got their respective day jobs or matriculate to their universities.

lets see what i'll miss most about tekong.

1) Happy-GO-LUCKY asswipes as company. A bunch of dysfunctionals from different background who left lots of impressions, memories and more importantly teach me a thing or two about the lives they are leading. From Matreps with 2 cute kids who calls me "uncle sachok" the moment i bought them ice creams, to Mr "I-know-all-coz-i'm-from-JC" cina guys.

2)The various stupid activities we could indulge in when we stay in.

3)Technically, we can't really die of hunger in Tekong these days. There's aplenty of sembilangs,kerapus and tambans there for the taking along the coastlines.

And come June-August(which is now!) the durian trees along Salabin/Ammo Dump, bear the king of fruits for desserts.

Finally, after a scrumptous meal we can take the duty driver and drive along to the northeast of Tekong to Unum and have some heat theraphy at Tekong's hot spring.

Drunkards enjoy cheap beer at the mess. sigh.

4)oh of course, they definitely keep my fitness in check w free gyms and countless IPPTs.

Then again, aside from those things listed above, they are shitloads other things the army offered that I could live without. E.g Duties. Lets just stop at one in case i couldnt stop ranting.

Now give me my pink IC already. and wake me up once September starts. I'll be at my ORD Mood Bed.

Good Day, civilians! : D

2008-05-12T00:33:00.002+08:00

here's a word of advice.

DON'T F*CKING LITTER, ASSHOLES.

i got fined.

nearly ran away - was about to do that.

"Don't you run, I'll double charge you". The fat Indian "health officer" sternly warned. You dont look too healty, Mr Health Officer.

"Macha, I'm NSF la macha, where go money to pay". Begging for my ass to be let off the hook.

"Kawan, I'm just doing my job la kawan. Next time please dont try to run." He said sincerely.

$200 freaking bucks for a cigarette butt. I should have dumped a whole bag of trash there. Prolly then its more worth it.

Abah went for his forearm op. He got metal slab inserted for his broken forearm.

"Your dad's an iron man now." The doctor joked.

So does that makes me iron boy? or what. -.-

Dad's pretty pathetic when he's in pain. You see, he's seldom in pain or even fall sick. He's like the strongest man in the house. And when I see him in bed like that, its pretty sad. Its like now I'm the strongest man in the house and there's this big responsibility on my shoulders. Sigh.

oh well, he's been discharged and all is going well. its sweet to see mum getting all worked out about dad when he's in the operating theater and insisting that i stick around the hospital for the 4 hours because i have the same blood type as dad. -.-

lol.

2008-05-04T03:03:00.013+08:00

"yang, i'm really sorry." she said morosely, giving me THAT look. Slightly downcasted eyes, those moisturised rosy cheeks, pouting her red hot lower lips.

Just how can I be angry with you again, even after spending nearly 3/4 of my 2nd May at home doing nothing but sleep and watching random episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond.

Now here's some pre-birthday images, I'd share.

Oh you're so gonna regret saying this line when we get married. heh heh. *horny hubby smile*

Fricken Lacoste Whites! Wooot! I love them whites! :D
My feet are smiling already!

Sick Sushis! Stop the conveyor belt already!

Club 22, baby.

Yellow girl in yellow outfit. Baeeeek!

My smoking buddy from 1930s. He smoked that and he's still fighting fit. Who says smoking kills?

After pecking those hot red lips I talked about earlier.

I love this one.

At 22, I still have faith that there's only 1 god, Allah. I still have a family that waits for me to come home everyday, a beautiful god-sent angel as a companion, soulmate, lover and friends who'd still accompany me for lunches or chat with me on msn.

At 22, I'm still a grateful scrawny man who cherish these lil simple things in life.

By my 23rd birthday, I should at least have a permanent job with a stable monthly income. Thats my aim. Oh well. We'll see.

ps: thank you love. I appreciate whatever you've put into.

2008-04-29T10:43:00.002+08:00

few things that made my day yesterday, or maybe not.

1) When my tuition kid asked me, "Bang, is China in ASEAN." -.- yes, i gave him that look at honestly broke the news to him. " You're gonna fail tommorow." China in ASEAN?!
sigh. whats happening to the education system?!

2)When this "special" guy (he's mentally disabled), barged into the toilet and Tanah Merah Mrt and asked me,

"Are you malay?"

"Technically, yes", I replied with an intellectual snort.

"Which country?" he enquired again curiously.

"Italy?" i replied hesistantly.

"I'M SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU!!" at this point he was so happy.

"Likewise bro, take care now." as i made my move.

: D I'm glad he's so happy coz he saw me. hahah! whoever your name is, just dont do that to some serial killer or something, you might end up in crime watch.

3)oh of course meeting the missus made my day. she had to cover my eyes from behind and i nearly thought it was the guy from the MRT toilet and i went like "WOOO!", but apparently she giggled and i recognise straight away it was my angel. :D

And she insisted on walking and then offered me to exchange her white "tik tok" shoes with my comfy sneakers which i declined and as a result we took the bus home instead after walking to the next bus stop. WOMAN CANT ROUTE MARCH FOR NUTS! lol! :D

4)And then i decided to book in at 2330hrs. Bought mee rebus and stuff. As i walked along the dark corridors towards my bunk, budak-budak setan from my department decide to "park" a pocong at a dark corner which caused my precious mee rebus to slip out of my hand and causing me to have a matrep fit.

"EH TAKOT KAPER?! KALAU BERANI DATANG LA!" I blurted out, when honestly, at this point i was actually thinking, "shit, is this for real. please say its a prank."

lol. ye la wa wobble la. sua sendeng sikit. favour eh takmo spot.

oh and they decide to give me an early birthday bash with excuses like "maner tau besok-besok kao amek off kaper. boleh lagau, kita lagau dulu."

thanks eh, pocongs. nearly got me there. actually they got me for a while. I was so relieved when i heard them laughing and when Pai jumped out of the bedsheet , he's covered in.

sigh.

another tuition lesson today. But today its maths! yeay shitloads of homework for him! *start circling pages and folding them for his homework*

2008-04-25T00:18:00.002+08:00

ahh its been a while.

i was waiting for my marshmellowpie just now at eunos and there's this getai show. i just sat there among the ah peks at the far end of the station watching from afar. Then this ah pek nudged me.

"lu pon suka tengok ini ah?"

"ni wa punya favourite la, pek"

"hahaha!", he went as he mumbled some hokkien profanities and god knows what to his comrades.

"lu isap ijau ka?", as he offered me a Rotham's Consulate Menthol. I declines politely.

"aiya angkat la, wa tau lu isap ijau punya orang. angkat, angkat!" he insisted.

now who said there's no such things as free fags.

2008-03-30T00:17:00.003+08:00

apparently i only get the inspiration to blog when in camp. ok, fine i'm too lazy at home and now i'm bored to death in camp. pfft, weekend duties.

finally the missus finished he shoot of Invisible Children. For the past weeks i've been pretty invisible too while she's out shooting.

ah crap, now i'm sleepy. its the "i'm too lazy to blog that my eyes get heavy when i tye" syndrome.

oh well.

have a good sunday people. ok i'll update more often. i still cant believe i look like anuar zain though. great voice but he's a faggot. while i'm the total opposite.

haha.

:D

2008-03-20T17:14:00.000+08:00

Wtf?!

2008-02-14T00:13:00.010+08:00

6TH APRIL 2002

Woke up slightly later today. There's some stupid Riding For The Disabled flag day and 4G was assigned to Orchard Road. Not bad considering its town. And off I went to Orchard with Sapek blasting my Minidisc player to the max and dozing off in the bus, I think...i've been so engrossed with May's Sketsa Sebuah Cinta and Cintamu Mekarmu Di Hati. Love's in the air my son.

As we were walking up and down Orchard Road asking for donations for RDA, I can't stop thinking of her. I was wondering the whole morning what is she up to and stuff like that. I heard she had to collect donations in Tampines. Well, I dont mind collecting donations for whatever in Tampines, at least my eye candy is around. : ) at the same time i was thinking of probably asking her out, but gosh, like paisey sia. what if she said no, maner nak letak muka ni.."Kena reject per boy?!" urghh! but I've got to ask la. C'mon I've known this girl since sec one.

"Probably next week", I told myself. and the sms came. It was her! wooot!

"Gd morning syg.I;m going to Bugis to get Oliver's birthday present, wanna come" or something like that la.

"Gulp!" For a moment I hesitated. "Serious kaper siak..pegi aje lah, this is your chance!"

And that afternoon, for the first time, I went for a date with her (not technically a date but who cares!) and for the first time too...

i ditched my friends for her.."DAH PANDAI PAITAO MEMBERS! RABAK!"(and who cares about that too!)

And i made my way to Tampines and met up with her. We decided to train to Bugis.

Awkward. Very very awkward.

"This is the girl whom you've always talk to in sec 1 and 2, and what happened now, ghani."

"Aku nk ckp aper sia. Think. Think." I've been quite for too long.

"So have your class done the geography test? You're taking combined humans too right?" I blurted out.

"Nice..Geography..Smooth dude, thats very smooth." my bitchy inner voice said.

And i slowly started conversing with the girl whom was my classmate for 2 years about Oliver and whathaveyous. The girl, who I've been messaging without fail, everyday, for the past 7 months. I'm trying my best to play it cool, to make it look like it wasnt my first time doing this, to appear confident, assured. But god knows whats brewing inside me. "Hati abang ni, tuhan saje yg tahu."

Upon reaching the Wallet Shop at Bugis we started looking for Oliver's present. She was INDECISIVE. I mean IS indecisive. and that was one of the decision i had to make for the first time, i just chose one of the wallets really, but still, it wasnt easy having to make decisions on the first date.

"Is she testing me?" I thought. "Maybe not. Maybe she's just like that. just maybe. I'll find out soon enough. Anyway, I'm too in love with her! Mabuk cinta beb! Tak kisah la benda-benda ni semua!"

And we leave that as that, and proceeded to Masjid Sultan for Asar. Or was it Zohor? Not sure.

"Macam minah convert sia, dekni. Cina in school uniform entering mosque. Damn cute." I thought again. (you think, he thought, then who confirm?)

I waited for her outside the mosque and she came. (Of course she came)

Decided to take the bus back instead. And so we walked to the bus stop. Along the way while on the road divider, some dust got into my eyes. I rubbed them as usual. But i dont know why that day, i decided to overdo it. I was hoping she'd pull my hand and ask me to stop rubbing it. She ignored.

"Plan failed. Takpe boleh try lagi." (ngahaha!)

Bus number 32 came and we board it. Bus was pretty empty. In fact it was very empty. She went straight to the back of the bus, on the right side seats.

"Now this is another first time I'm doing this with a girl." She told me she's tired from walking collecting donations and that she's perspiring. Now thats actually the first time I've been so close to her and god does it feels good, just to sit beside the girl you like on the bus. That made my bloody day. I dont even feel tired anymore. I just want time to stop so I could be there forever.maybe not.

"you want to hear some music? I've got this nice song"

"Ok", she said and I passed her one side of the earphone. I moved closer so the earphones wont keep coming out of her ears. (yea right i moved closer coz of that.)

And this song played the very moment bus no. 32 make a right hand turn near Kallang Mrt. I remembered this very very clearly.

Little that I know that she actually doesnt understand much of it. I thought the song really described how i felt that day. Well its ok, at least it made her sleep. She dozed off.

There and then i saw the most peaceful state of this woman. I cant help watching her sleep, occasionally glancing away, just in case she caught me watching her sleep. She wasnt seating straight up, her posture was laid back. It's as if she had known me too long that she felt at ease by my side. At least that was what I thought.It made me happy. I kept very still so as not to wake her up. Again I was hoping her head would slowly find its way to my shoulders. But not this time. She eventually woke up by herself and we alighted at her stop.

The walk home from the bus stop was pretty quiet too. And i sent her to her lift. she thanked me for sending her there. The first time ever I sent her there.She smiled as she entered the lift, I melted inside.

It was a beautiful day. A very beautiful one indeed.

2008-02-01T21:51:00.000+08:00

For the first time after so long, I actually cleaned the toilet in camp. It was filthy. Well as filthy as public toilets at old coffee shops, but I helped to clean it. And it was fun playing with water. :D

I realise that I love it when B, introduce me to her friends as "my boyfriend". Macam bangga. ngahaha! That was my randomness at its best.

I'm out to fetch her now, and I have to wake up at 0500hrs tommorow morning. Bunk inspections on Saturdays is a pain.

Sigh.

2008-01-29T02:25:00.000+08:00

And finally i'm back online. Like imran said, i think i spend more quality time with myself without the net. Doing more 'rewarding' activities like reading. MY WORD! Reading and Ghani just doesnt go hand in hand, but it did. Carrying a lil red book with the word STEPHEN KING in bold white letter did make me feel and look a lil more intellectual. LOL. Oh and reading on buses and trains because I got so immersed in the book. I just completed Carrie by Stephen King. After a long time on hiatus - from reading. Which is a good thing I would say. And the book is pretty immersing. About this Carrie White girl, with an extremist Christian mum that I'd kill if I was her. That bitch. Terbawak-bawak nampak. ngahahaa!

Today, I met love at Al-Azhar in Bukit Timah. Hanging around with her filming crew and coursemates. Apparently it made her day, so of course, I'm happy. And for that split second that I "dropped your heart" , its just..instinctive. naughty boy instinct. and it was heaven. :)

It was 1am when I finally bid good bye to her at her doorsteps. She gave me 8 bucks to take a cab, but I felt like walking. So like a true infantry conscript, I route marched back home. Trying a few short cuts here and there, breathing the chilly midnight air and taking a closer look at things that I usually whizz by while on the bus or cab. Things like red ants marching in a straight line and how they fell from the barricade when I blew at them and they didnt get hurt because they are so light, gravity doesnt take its toll on them . No b, I didnt eat them for late supper. Even as a kid, though i love eating black ants, I'd give the red ones a pass. haha!

Honestly, I'm a lil exhausted from the walk but i sure had fun today. Getting my internet up and running, having a great night with love and spending 45 minutes walking with my shadow and blowing red ants off the barricade so they can earn the "Airborne" badge like the commandos do.

Its been a beautiful day. I hope its the same for you too. : D

2008-01-04T01:54:00.000+08:00

These dizzy spells. prolly something big in store, yes? I dont know, i just thought god have something big in store. For the ultimate change. Yes, you can't change nature but change is nature. I'm going to play a part in it. :) for the better of me and mankind.

today is the 4th of January. Only the 4th day of the year, so Happy New Year fellow earthlings. (except that green thing over there with tentacles all over. happy new year to you too, thing. don't be too hard on yourself, looks arent everything. Well thats what fuglies like me always say to make things better.)

Oh yes. Finally the army has done one decent act in my 1 year plus of my service. They decide to book the whole Lido cineplex tommorow and treat armymen (in Tekong to be exact) to 2 great movies. I am Legend and National Treasure. But I still have to wake up at 6 in the morning. Very well then, if thats what it takes to watch two free movies then, be it.

Update. My memory card on my lovely Nokia 6120 Classic decides to delete all the juicy pictures and mp3 and vids in it. Now i get where that "classic" on the hp came from. sigh. But its ok, its just short of a hundred pics from the KL trips and mp3s. So its not so bad. But i'll upload some pics later la, for you viewing pleasure. All words and no jpeg file makes ghani's blog a dull webby to look at, furthermore by the lack of updates.

Benazir Bhutto is shot dead. May peace be upon her. I think thats one inspirational women all Muslim women should look up to. I know nuts about politics, but I thought she did a great deal for Pakistan. May her soul rest in peace. From Imran's theorem though, she's still not dead, but in Cuba with Yasser Arafat, Eddy Guererro and other big names. In my theory, she's by the heavens, insyallah, for her efforts to lead a Muslim nation.

I desperately need to work on my fitness and to get big. I'm too scrawny for my liking. Dianabol should do the trick but do I risk my liver and other side effects just to get big. Thats something debatable really, but i dont know.

Oh i have been having unexpected visitors on my blogs, people who i dont even guess would come, so thank you, and come again. I'll try to update more this month ok, cupcakes.

love will be very busy with her shooting and I've promised her to be a good boy and not interfere with her work. She's too stressed so i wont add to that list. It's not synonymous to me.
You see, i'm a ghani-cologist. and now they came up with a new name for me - THE CURE FOR PMS. so stress dont really go along with me right now. I heal and soothe you, woman. If strepsils is the first aid for sorethroat, i'm the first aid for stress. and this only applies to women so Mr Faggot need not apply. lol.

Thats pretty much a long entry so lets feast your eyes with some unfeasible pictures aight, munckins.

Davey and I have receding hairlines but we dont care, right Davey?

Aliff is in his usual merry mood for the NYE! yippee!

You know you're in good hands when you have 2 POW-LICE men accompanying you on NYE.

Ok, thats all. This uploading crap in blogger is getting on me nerve so yea. lol. You guys have a good year ok, and i promise I'll update real soon. :)

2007-12-10T18:33:00.000+08:00

its pretty much raining cats and dogs outside and i'm on duty today. AGAIN! sorry for the lack of updates, primarily due to the fact that i'm sick. Sakit Malas.

The past few weeks have been filled with stay ins and duty and very very little time for the missus. And of course, i'm missing her a lot. I dont know about you guys, but do you often get this psychic thing with your other half? like you're listening to some love song and naturally you thought of her and thus flipping out your phone to text her how much you actually loved her, and before you could press the send button, she called you.

Mind you, this happened too often that sometimes it freaked me out.

And talking about songs, there are a number of them that would just trigger my memory to the not so distant pass. Like it would bring me down memory lane kinda thing.

like some of these:

Firehouse- i live my life for you
The time when i first ate spaghetti from Macdonalds on a bus ride. A long one that is. With this girl that leaves this shampoo smell everytime she puts her head on my shoulder and doze off in less than 10 seconds.

Iron Maiden - Afraid to Shoot Strangers
Oh the morning moments with Sapek in bus 67. that small eyed dexter look alike who always waited for me cause i was late. dude, i cherish the moments with you *gay hug* ngahah!

snow patrol - Cars
"if i lay here, if i just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world" i was in Tekong and this song was introduced to me by her. And of course that unforgettable night. it always reminded me of that.

and of course shitloads of other songs that i havent mentioned here that someway or another remind me of the past.

sigh its only 7pm and i'm so sleepy now. urgh this my be the duty syndrome.

2007-11-12T18:03:00.001+08:00

and we'll just sit by the beach, look at each other and laugh.

me and you, just laugh.

because they dont get it.

hell no.

because,

its

two

against

the

world.

: D

I'm invincible beside you, suhaila. I really bloody am.

*flexes biceps*

anyway love, when do you wanna get your back pack? :)

2007-11-12T03:19:00.000+08:00

like i said.

2 against the world.

wooot!

2007-11-10T02:06:00.000+08:00

this news about a 12 year old Filipino girl, hanging herself is so bloody disturbing that i lost my mood to crap. its not always a good thing to read news while moving your bowels you know.

life's pretty mundane lately. thus, the lack of updates. its been weekends, then camp then weekends. and of course, my good lady have pretty livejournal entries and whatever she's ranting about there pretty much applies to me too - minus the PMS part that is. : D

she's been upset, apparently she feels she got too many acquaintances but lacks true friends. women do get worried over this kinda stuff you know - emotional beings. Good thing about men like me is that, i dont even give half a shit about friends. Yea we talk about the brotherhood crap and such, being jiwa members a lil emo shit here and there, but at the end of the day, i really dont care if i have no friends or whats not. As long as the divine one is there to stay, I'd still greet makcik cleaner with a smile and happily sleep in peace during office hours.

My point being, we're in our own lil bubble my dear. We've build our lives around each other, to the point that everything boils down to you and me. You've always been my best friend. If there's anyone I'd reveal my darkest secrets to, its you. I do understand my love, the need to have friends, but lets face it, just how many of those would really put their head on the chopping block in your time of need.(with the exception of your sisters. they'd kill me and sell my balls in thailand if i dont mention this) I DEFINITELY WOULD. I'd put my DICK on the line. ok dick is a bit too far-fetched. Ok, balls. I'd put my balls on the line.

Yea anti climax. Nice lovey dovey entry and then the balls and dicks have to come in. just to make my point, that love have become too subtle to describe this thing between you and me.

oh well. anyways, i scored a goal just now. tripped a mammoth of a guy and still got the cheek to sneer and drop sarcastic comments like "clumsy bastard" to the poor fella. I think i'm getting meaner by the day, but then again, who doesnt.

have a great weekend maggots!

2007-10-31T01:00:00.000+08:00

This first line is dedicated to nisa who have grown bored of the first line in the last entry..suker tak?

Kristino got into a bike accident and his gf passed away. for the first time in a long time i actually had to sit to recompose myself upon hearing the news of a friend involved in an accident. I feel him really. And immediately, i called love, just to make sure she's there, to make me feel better. and i did when i heard her ngantok voice.

Kris, get well soon aite bro and yours would be one of the saddest ORD an nsf could ever get. Your ORD is next month if i'm not mistaken but you should stay strong. Those who visited said, you're still pretty cheerful when they visited you, but god-knows how you're feeling inside. Dah memang bahagian kau di dunia begini bro. Semoga roh arwahynya dicucuri rahmat.

i now believe that bikes are cursed. and especially so during the festive periods. losing a loved one in that manner is just....I dont know. I dont have a strong enough word to describe it. Devastating is too mild in this case.

And today when i fetched her from school and saw that beauty right in front of me, i cant help but touch her face to make sure it was real.

Then when she put her head on my shoulders, that was it. Thats the moment that made my week.

B, i say this everyday.

I love you. I'm a big liar, but thats one thing i can never lie about.

2 AGAINST THE WORLD.

2007-10-16T22:08:00.000+08:00

and Idulfitri came again.
woke up late for the solat but still got ample time to reach Ghufran on time.

its a family ritual to have breakfast together after solat Idulfitri at the dining table, and of course, breakfast during hari raya would mean the likes of ketupats and rendangs is inevitable.

food, glorious food. nisa jealous? haha.

grey cekak musangs and mum's brooch on the songkok. :D

and then there was this cutie at nenek's (paternal) house in sengkang. cute kan my niece!! tembam, big eyes and soooooo gebuu! ahaha! aku dokong ajer dier nak.

and four of the seven people I'd die for.

and naughty lil cousins who asked me questions like "abg ghani ader girlfriend? i ader 7 girlfriend tau."
and the first one on the right inspires to be a soldier. gd luck my son.haha!

and "the ride" which guzzle fuel like there's no tommorow.

talking of which, i had my first drive thru at Mac-ckers and i mounted, err wait no more like hit the curb at approximately 60km/h. the tyre went flat and i was left in panic. its not like the army tagline "shag cannot think", but its more like "people's car siol, macam maner siak ni!"

make a few phonecalls but eventually this nice abang, helped me out with the changing of tyre. thanks abg azri, kalau kao tkder confirm mencacah siak aku.

ok blogger decided that i couldnt upload more photos so, fine.

im sleepy as usual. so i'm gonna stop my rants here.

on a serious note, changing of tyres w/o proper tools is tiring..

2007-10-13T00:11:00.000+08:00

Eid Mubarak to all!

Camat Rayo!

I slept for only 2 hours in the last 24 hrs. I am very shagged. The MPVs here and I've been sending mum and fetching love from work.

I love today. Go geylang with love and got my capal, and in between i got drenched, praying under heavy rain for solat Jumaat and I spring cleaned my room..wohoo! festive mood! but very very tired.

today's solat Jumaat seem sad, since its the last solat Jumaat for ramadhan. I felt something different today while praying under the rain. This feeling, I cannot describe.

Then it was this feeling i felt with love by my side while I am driving and then looking for parking spaces in Geylang and eventually shop for stuff with her at Geylang. I love that feeling. :D

ok, looks like im talking in circles. let the pics do the talking aight.

As usual ketupats, the staple food during Idulfitri. Talking of which, I finally mastered the art of anyaming ketupats!! woooot! KETUPAT MASTER!

I ripped off my curtains and suddenly my room look so bright. :D

Yeay dah bersih dan teratur!

The top shelves arranged according to the best Feng-shui taking into consideration the Chi-flow.Macam paham. B, byk benda familiar kan?

A 3 picture collage i made in less than 30 seconds.

"If one can anyam the ketupat, one can make a collage in less than 30 seconds" - Confused-cius
Lawa kan, b! :D

Blue curtains, blue bedsheet and blue wall. Tinggal sepasang kurungan biru ajer tinggal.

ok, im done. im damn sleepy and tired.

Selamat Hari Raya pada semua.

p/s: korang byk dosa sama aku. paham eh?

NGAHAHA!

MINAL AIDIL WALFAIZIN.

2007-10-07T04:55:00.000+08:00

today, i want to talk about the colourful things in my room.

My Brown Door..

My Sky Blue Patched Wall...

My Biege Cupboard...

The White "NO SMOKING" sign i ripped off 7 years ago...

AND.....

a BRONZE me!!

that is some of the colourful things in my room. I hope you like the colours in my room, like I do.
Have a colourful, Sunday! : )

2007-10-05T14:55:00.000+08:00

TGIF! yeay its friday..

One of the few times I managed to solat Jumaat at Masjid Al-Istighfar. Been soo long since I've been there. Used to volunteer and help distributing bubur Ramadhan during my secondary school days there. Dulu abg pon budak masjid. Zaman ustazah aku ader crush dgn aku. Nghahaha! Yes, ustazah, she was like 19 or 20 and I was like 14. I terror kan, b.

i was i'tikaf-ing in the mosque, when I realise that ladies dont really have an opportunity to experience this whole solat jumaat thing. The camaraderie, the spirit of Ummah thing that only men share during the Friday prayers. Like how anyone would just make space for late comers or let some pakcik selit in between the saf so he can do his solat tahiyatul masjid.

Its trivial stuff like that, but during the Ramadhan period especially the camaraderie is heartfelt. Feeling proud to be a Muslim, when you see streams of men making their way to the mosque regardless of what they do. They literally put aside whatever they do, just to make their way to the mosque, join other men to do solat jumaat and listen to the Friday sermon which time and again remind us, to maintain the Taqwa to Allah. Just that tingly feeling you get when you step into the mosque, like theres no strangers, just brothers in Islam.

its also a chance to meet long lost friends, or relative or whoever. For the friday prayers truly unite Muslim men.: )

: ) happy friday all. its a hot and humid day so drink lotsa water during buka.

love, baik2 tau pat work.

2007-10-01T21:29:00.000+08:00

mom still treats me like a lil boy everytime i go to the doc with her.

she'll insist i take a seat and make the necessary registrations. and when the clinic assistant ask who is she registering for she said "MY BOY LA!" she speaks very loudly you see, coz she got this hearing problem.

I seldom say this, but I dont know what I'd do without her. Always affectionately calling me "Abang". "Nanti abang pegi doc dgn mummy. Badan kau panas tu."

I admit, i havent been a good, filial son but I know that she knows, deep down, this boy of hers still love her and will try his best not to fail her.

One of those moments when I cant hold my tears is during hari raya when I hug her so tight after asking for forgiveness. And I hate it when she cries, coz I'll end up crying also.

Emo boy.

Mak, I'll do my best to take care of you and Abah in the future. I may not be the most fillial son, but im still your son nonetheless..

im so high on medication.

sayang mak.

2007-09-30T22:25:00.000+08:00

i understand.

2007-09-24T19:59:00.000+08:00

i was browsing through Anakmelayu and I came across this very interesting blog...suddenly i'm oh so proud to be a malay man, Boyanese to be exact.

here it goes, an extract from Anakmelayu.com, a blog by Your RoYaL HiGhNeSS.

I work 4 an international company. My colleagues r all multi-racial & nationalities.. spain, french, italians, english, american, malay, chinese, indians are the norm 2 see.

While many of my colleagues tergila-gilakan ngan mat salleh yg blue/green/grey eyes, I'm not over my malay men.

Reasons?

1) Their Mocha Coloured Skin. U have to love that abt a Man.. Though fairer people can go sun tanning or what nots.. But dis skin colour has this great effect on Malay Men. brings out the eyes..

(ahh some credit for the cokelat skin and big round eyes.)

2) Their Love 4 Mum. Believe it or not. Maybe becos we're asians. every Sunday, I'd see some hot dude with plastic bags & their mum up front & the best thing is they're proud to be there n check me out they will.. haha..

(not forgetting nenek. yea i follow nenek go pasar, bt no i dont check ppl out and im not the hot dude w plastic bag, my nenek ask me push trolley..haha! : D)

3) The words they say to you.. Though I love U & Aku Cinta Padamu are the same.. But bila dituturkan dlm bahasa melayu.. *darm* I can melt, be solid and melt all over again.. Of cos, some sincerity will help too.

(though my javanese/cina lady dont really quite understand the mushy malay stuff i told her, i still do tell em to her, coz i think its sweeter in malay.: D)

4) Their tata tertib.At weddings, at majlis kenduri, at kematian, or at the mosque.. or even Hari Raya.. I love it when a Malay man.. sits among HIS genders/peers, picks up his hands (or kitab for those who can read) & slightly sway his body side to side as he recites the prayers.

(This my friend, you cant get from other races. Personally i underestimated this side of Malay men myself. Coz no matter hw Matrep a malay men can be, when in these kinda functions, they kinda try to be on their best behaviour or they dont turn up at all..hahaha!)

5) The way they fight. Have u ever seen malay boys fight? It's like they fight with their heart n soul. I mean, of cos, there are some cowards.. But still.. I've seen one.. (ok, a couple) & i nvr fail to be in awe.

(Ok, this one sounds dumb, unless you're talking about zaman hang tuah and hang jebat, bt yea malays like to fight.haha..in the word of the Matreps "Selagi wa boleh rempuh, wa rempuh beb! Hantar nyawa punya!"

6) How abt the way they hold their friendship? Or in lament terms JIWA MEMBERS? I love that!!

(hahha! brotherhood, like no others. be warned tho, "janji melayu" wa tk boleh tolerate. saper lambat mesti kena hamput punya. braders, tk braders, wa tk kira..nghaha!.)

7) Wat abt the way they dress? Mat Kental lar, abg2 lar. Hip hop lar, reggae lar, punk rock lar, cross dressing lar!! hahaha. wat ever the concept, the malay men know they carry it well.

(which shows why there are quite a number of posers among malay men! haha, lets put it malay men nowadays have better fashion sense.)

8) Clans. Ever notice how Malay men reacts in groups? Be it Group Motor ke, Group Surfing ker, group kwn sekolah/kerja jer.. Each and everyone of them will act so macho whenever a lady walks by.

(Ni standard..Pantang nampak chickies satu2 mesti control hensem..ngahaha!)

9) The fact that they’re circumcised. Hey, it’s a religious law, right?

(NGAHAHA! This one important siak! Hygiene!! Plus..its for..ok i shant go there..hahah! You'll ladies will find out when you're legall married to a MALAY MAN.)

So single ladies out there, forget the latinos, the blue eyes of the ang mohs, the kerinting of the afro-american, or the cute korean soap opera actors.. Go grab yourself a mocha coloured guy coming back from Friday prayers..

An example of a Cina Man thinking he looks good in the baju kurung. GEMOK SIAK KAO, SAPEK! Bak kut teh tu kurangkan, ji..

The "Macam Paham" Discussions Malay men get involve in.
Khidhir : Kiter sebagai lelaki melayu...
Me : (thinking) apa siak dekni mengarut?!
Wan Junid : Gulp?! Mcm paham ajer si wakrak ni!

Sapek : "I look better in streetwear! Baju kurung makes me look fat and ugly! : ("

Yeah whatever la,Xia Pek.

hahah..ok the photos are random, bt i dont care, I feel like it.

"Siapa bilang lelaki tk menawan, tak menarik hati, tiada memikaaat!"

hohohohoh!

Happy eh, B dah dpt cokelat man that can make cokelat pots...

Rindu awak!!

2007-09-22T01:50:00.000+08:00

Everytime awak kalau senyap sikit ajer time tgh bual malam-malam, mesti maknanya awak tertido.

Biler awak dah kenyang, then dah mandi, dah wangi, mesti awak rasa ngantok, pasal kalau awak rasa bersih dan kenyang, awak rasa selesa so awak ngantok.

Bila awak tengah ngantok, mesti bebual merepek, pasal awak main hembus cakap ajer. Sembarang!

Kalau perkara-perkara yg pat atas ni terjadi, awak tk payah tanya saya macam saya tau. I just do. :) because I ought to. Saya patut tahu.

Like how you know that I am angry but still ask. : D

Then there's this telepathic thing about you messaging me when I'm thinking of us and me calling you when you're speed dialling my number on the handphone. :) I love that.

Been a tough year aint it, love? Many-many bumps and lembah berduri yg harus kita lewati(chewah!) this year, but we still pull through right, cupcake? From the day we celebrated number 5 at Pizza Hut last year, which was the first time I ever book out in my army life till this date, many changes happened. But the most crucial factor was, what stays the same.

And that would be our undying love for each other and this special thing going on between you and me. :)

The beauty of all this hardship with been through this year is that, it just makes me want you more and crave for your presence more each time, more than the first time our eyes meet - that moment you stole my heart at TKSS hall on the first day of seconday one.

We've been through many milestones in life together - Secondary school life, O-Levels, graduating with a Diploma in hand, your uni stint, my enlistment to the Army and nearly a decade of birthdays and such.

I hope, the next milestone we are going through together is our wedding, insyallah.

I've blabbered a lot.

Happy 6th, sweetheart.
to many more years to come, insyallah.
just look how far, we've come.
I Love You, Suhaila.

3 reasons why I love this pic so much.
1) My cina love is by my side.
2)We're at the place we first me - TKSS.
3)After photoshopping the photo, my hideous moustache is concealed. : D

2007-09-19T21:01:00.001+08:00

a lil sthing-sthing from imran's lj...sigh, everyones into LJ now...pfft.

01.What does your MSN personal msgs
say?
- "And, yes, I've dreamt of you too.."- damn right baby.

02. What does your default photo mean?
-that i only smile when i'm with suhaila in my photo.

03. Who is the first person on your
top 6?
- suhaila said from ra-ra bazaar.

04.What exactly are you wearing right
now?
- blue soccer shorts and absolutely nothing underneath..is that information necessary?

05. What's your current problem?
- i need more money.

06. Do you have a Date on this fine
day?
- no, i wish i could meet her, but i have this stupid graduation parade thing at work.

07. What makes you the happiest?
- meeting her and doing stuff together and laughing away in our own lil bubble!

08. Have you ever met anyone from
frenster?
- not anyone new.

09. What were you doing at midnight
last night?
- making a lil something-something which doesnt really turn out well..sigh.

10. If you could go back in time and
change something,what would it be?
- not to OOC from SISPEC perhaps..PERHAPS..then again, maybe nahhhh! i wont change a thing.

11. Do you like to smile?
- not really..i have a crooked smile.

12. Ever had a near death experience?
- yes!! on this insane ride at woodlands funfair! so scared to death ar!!

13. Name an obvious asset you have.
- exceptionally huge biceps and triceps for my scrawny lil frame.

14. What's the name of the song that's
stuck in your mind right now?
- Lelaki Ini - Anuar Zain

15.Any celeb you would marry?
- Suhaila Said from RARA BAZAAAR!!! WOOT celebrity!!

16. Who will cut and paste this first?
- god knows.

18. Name someone with the same
birthday as you?
- David Beckham

19. Do you have a crush on someone?
- a life long crush on her lor..

20. Have you ever vandalized someones
private property?
- private part you mean? yes.

21.Have you ever burp in front of your
friends?
- yea and fart and pee on them coz they disturb me while pee-ing.

22. Have you ever sung in front of a
large group?
- YES. and for who else right..:D

23. What's the first thing you notice
about the OPPOSITE sex?
-damn fair skin.

25. What does your 4th text message
you sent say?
- "B, I buka dalam bas lagi."

26. What does your last received text
say?
- "kemas bilik sayang. nak asar ni"

27. Have you ever hurt yourself on
purpose?
- like punching the wall?

28. Say something totally random about
you?
- i smell of cranberry.

29. Has anyone ever said you looked
like a celebrity?
- pelakon malaysia maner tah..why must be MALAYSIAN! knn.

30. Do you do karaoke?
-not for a loooong time.

31. Do you listen to System of a Down?
- no. i hate them.

32. What is the closest thing to you?
- my keyboard.

33. Do you have anything pierced?
- no and i dont intend to.

34. Do you eat fish?
- damn right!! fish is my staple food..especially ikan tongkol and ikan ayam-ayam! hahaha!
seriously, there is a fish called ikan ayam-ayam..gi tanyer mak korang.

35. Do you like pain?
- no.

36.Do you like to shop?
- yeaps! my favourite pastime!

37. Whose bed did you last sleep in?
- my bed lar..then whose?

38.What was the last thing you paid
for with a credit card?
- i kinda forget but i think its something from LA SENZA..:p

39. Who was the last person you talked
to on the phone?
- B!!!!!

40. What is the background on your
desktop?
- some bleach anime wallpaper.

43. Do you have any weird relatives?
- my cousin who says "eh abgkuz ni pendek eh rupanya!" padahal dier lagi pendek..eh riah eh..if your reading this, happy birthday! haha!

44. What was the last movie you
watched?
- X-MEN 3 on my psp.

45. What was the last book you read?
- actually i forgot.

47. What is your favorite mall to shop
at?
- heeren maybe.

48. Recent pair of shoes/slippers you
bought?
- pointed whites from some shop in far east.

49.What song are you listening to
- bananrama - love in the first degree..mambo!

50. do people think you are beautiful?
- they should.

sigh..im bored.

2007-09-17T22:29:00.000+08:00

doing guard duty during weekends, without any familiar faces is such a dreadful experience..and its fasting month some more. with the enlistment going on at the ferry terminal it was such a mess la. sigh..its a wonder why CPL DAVE decided to escape with the SAR21 and cause hundreds of thousands of servicemen so much INCONVINIENCE coz apparently they decided to step up security measures. sigh.

she's been missed pretty badly. and thats why love, i waited though grumpily for your arrival at Changi Point today. :) and there she was, terkedek-kedek with her lappy bag searching for me, while i sneakily came behind her. Then her face so masam, but so cute. I like.hahha!

She bought dengdengs for me..: D my favourite lor. and w buka in the bus, w/o drinks. Then this abg malaysia beside me decide to open a can of bandung to rub salt into the wound. So i had to take out this large piece of dengdeng to show off to him. HAH! Dengdeng wins BIG TIME~! woooot!!

its always nice to meet up with love, though its just a short while. And i realised its been sometime since she saw me in my NO.4.: D

i had this baddd headache and it just subsided and now im feeling so so tired and i miss love again. I'll call her in a short while just to make sure she knows that she means the world to me.

awwww. ngahhahaa! have a great week and selamat berpuasa peeps..: )

2007-09-09T20:38:00.000+08:00

"Lelaki ini yang selalu mencintamu
Selalu, tanpa ragu
Lelaki ini yang selalu memuja
Hanya dirimu
Yang bertakhta dalam sanubariku,
Sanubari ku"

I dont really make reviews of songs, but Anuar Zain's latest hit singles is a must listen for me. Very different from his previous, composed by an Indonesian composer thus the difference in style.

I miss my sweetheart.

Gd night to all.

2007-09-07T22:23:00.000+08:00

exactly a year ago, around this time, i tucked myself into this totally unfamiliar single bed, together with 11 other malay singaporean guys in the same bunk, trying to force myself to sleep, unsure of whats in store for me for the next 3 months.

fast forward, its been a year since I was enlisted. and the best thing is that - i can tuck into my comfy home bed tonight, instead of SAF's bunk bed. :D

wasnt the greatest or the easiest 1 year i have been through, but I still am contented that I actually am closer to that pink IC, than ever before. Sure its no biggie, being a 1 year soldier, but I still am happy that I actually pull through. Life's been pretty good now, PTSSU have been very very good to me. Am taking nothing for granted.

"Have you ever wondered?
Why must we serve?
Because we have no choice,
And we lan-lan have to serve, have to serve. YAH!"

lol.

b, thanks for being there while the army torment me through and through. :D

i love u.

2007-09-04T21:14:00.001+08:00

and i gingerly gave that black box to her.

her reaction was priceless, though she knew what was coming when she saw "LA SENZA EXPRESS" on the box. I am happy that she was happy.

Honestly, I was pretty surprised that the potato salad and the chocopots turned out to be pretty good. The chocopot especially. I was searching geylang for the ramekins but decided on just tea cups instead, and it worked. I thought it tasted pretty good too.ngaahahha! A scoop of vaniall ice-cream with hershey's choco sauce would make it a perfect dessert. Nonetheless, as long as my love is happy, I'm happy.. :)

You're a big girl now sweetheart, I saw you grow from strength to strength. You've come a long way this year, munchkin and you did me proud with your brave decisions.: ) All these that happened just made you and me stronger than ever. Keep it up ok, miss 21.

apologies for this late late post, i really am pretty occupied with sleeping early and also camp these past few days. More updates, I promise...-not..hahha!

Besides the sweetheart's birthday, this Friday marks 1 freaking year of my service in the army.. HOOORAH! Can open an annual calendar, 1 more year to that pink IC..It's not that near yet, but heck, I deserve to be happy.

And of course, theres the big 6 on the 22nd. You know, I know eh B.

Its been pretty good so far. :) I am contented.

Right, to those guys or even ladies for that matter who wanted to try chocopots, here's the recipe. Pretty simple one, I'm going to make more of these with love..: D

Prep time: 5 minutes
Baking time: 20 minutes:
Cooling time: 15 minutes

Makes 4 - 6servings

Ingredients:
Butter for ramekins
3/4 cup(6 ounces) semisweet chocolate chips
1 stick (4 ounces) unsalted butter
2 large eggs
3/4 cup superfine sugar
3 tablespoons all-purpose flour

Directions:
1. Place baking sheet in an oven preheated to 400°F/200°C. Butter four 2/3-cup ramekins and set aside. I actually find these so decadently sweet, that I use ½ cup ramekins and make 6.

2. Using a microwave oven or double boiler, melt together the semisweet chocolate and the butter. Set aside to cool.

3. In a separate bowl, combine eggs, sugar and flour. Add cooled chocolate mixture, and mix until blended. Fold in chocolate chips.

4. Divide mixture evenly among ramekins and place on baking sheet. Bake until tops are shiny and cracked and chocolate beneath is hot and gooey, about 20 minutes.

Recommendations : This is best eaten warm. Or better, with vanilla ice cream. "Mesti 'pegi' punya dok!"

Selamat mencuba ya pemirsa!

My Sweet September.

2007-08-23T16:24:00.000+08:00

and so i decided to take a leave because i was late..i dont see the point of taking the hassle to book in and taking ferry and in the end having to attend staff parade for being late. so i just called the clerk to apply me leave for today.

cold empty buses just reminded me of us, during our secondary school days. the good old, care free days. when there's only me, you and us. : ) times when we could'nt care less what the world thinks. we're in this own lil bubble, taking endless busrides to nowhere. taking that walk along dunman road towards katong shopping centre where we would take our bus. those walks filled with her "niari i ader chemistry practical and i so smell like hydrochloric acid now" and my "alah niari satu hari i pat DnT workshop potong kayu, i lagi busuk" happy times, love, happy times.

sometimes, what keeps you going, are the sweet memories that are irreplaceable, and those that you hope one day would come again. face it, everyone needs a reason to keep going. it can be anything. and if it means that these sweet memories is the very thing that keeps me going everyday, then be it.

on a lighter note, anyone watches Nigella Lawson on Discovery and Living? damn, thats one hot momma. Though her recipes will surely shoot your cholestrol and sugar level up the roof, they look damn tasty lar can! And its damn simple..Plus she's sizzling, so no reason not to watch her on youtube, when you're bored in camp and that you're damn hungry...and all that good food must have make her be so voluptous, so darling, like i said, no need to diet, i like some flesh on my woman..: D

2007-08-18T02:11:00.000+08:00

i miss ramadhan more than ever.

I hope ramadhan can give me the peace i am looking for.

im in a mess and thats an understatement.

please Allah i want to make things right, keep this whole, tell me everything is going to be fine.

its the time when you feel this cold surge under your skin and nothing is scarier than that because you dont even know what it is, what it's for and why its you.

2007-08-10T22:09:00.000+08:00

i am on a mission tonight..

to get donuts for su in KL.

yes people i'm going to KL at midnight, kinda last minute but, when you got to go, you got to go..

"KL per ni malam?"

"Serious?!"

"Aku survey ticket arh, kalao ader kiter berangkat?"

"Jadik."

Simple eh, macam nk pegi geylang gitu.

Nachluddin, Zarkasih and Me.

Three muskeeteers per?

I made love happy today, and nothing could beat that. I brought her to Golden Mile to buy ticket, and she finds that place kinda scary. And this poor chubby thingy just cling onto my left forearm and right there i felt like a man..: D

nigella lawson is one hot woman. Hot, courteous and cook food which look as appealing as her.. wooot, MILF alert!

tkper, i'll have my own milf in 10 years time..wooot, cina lagi..kulit putih, tembam...ok i shant go into detail..conclusion - i WILL BE A HAPPY MAN, insyallah...ngahaha.

love take care while I look for your donuts. to all the readers, happy national day. - NOT.

enjoy the weekend..: D KL MARIII!

bukan aku tulis.

2007-08-06T01:44:00.000+08:00

b is still up at ALMOST TWO IN THE MORNING, doing god knows what. i am so tired because i went out with sapek earlier today. that bloody bugger asked me to accompany him to town because he wanted to shop. (b thinks it's so gay.) where he get the money from at this time of the month sia. talking about money, i have to stop spending. i have been splurging my money on new pants and shoes. food isn't a problem. b and i willingly fork out money on fooooood. and movies too. oh, we watched simpsons on friday. and transformers yesterday. GEREK SIAL! cool ah optimus prime. lawaaaaa! b asik-asik tanyer maner satu autobots, maner satu decepticons. nak tengok wayang pon tak senang! tu takper, b tak habis-habis dengan dier punyer sucre, gua punyer peng! nasib baik ader megan fox. fuhhhh, badan baik, beb! :D lain kali takmo tengok wayang dengan b lagi ah. mentang-mentang belaja film, asik cakap pasal shot sizes lah, different framings lah, and bad performance lah. bingit sey! dah lah. aku dah ngantok. nak tido ni.

ABANG DATANG, SAYANG!
HAH!

2007-07-31T00:39:00.000+08:00

Bon Jovi - Born to Be My Baby

"You were born to be my baby
And baby, I was made to be your man
We got something to believe in
Even if we don't know where we stand
Only God would know the reasons
But I bet he must have had a plan
Cause you were born to be my baby
And baby, I was made to be your man"

p/s: what we have is more than just us, baby. forever and always.

2007-07-29T23:18:00.000+08:00

3 things that will make my day instantly.

1) Having her in my arms, with her warm forehead against my neck.

2) The constant tugging of my pants everytime we wander around.

3) Her plain silly thought and fear that I don't love her anymore.

She made my day, alright..: )

2007-07-23T23:23:00.000+08:00

Spanking new whites...

Filthy Tattered Pink..

I still think the pink shoes are stylish coz they dont even sell it at Zara, pink i mean, I bought it as white virgin remember. And the pink was so darn perfect, that even the salesgirl asked where i bought it at and she didnt believed me that it was a mistake all along.

aniwaes, i had a good night walk w love, having dinner with her, having to wipe her tears while having dinner in LJS tampines, then purposely walking "physically close" to her coz I insisted on carrying her bag and she sleeping as usual on the bus ride home and finally gotten my hands on her bro's usb dongle so I can upload all this crappy photos online from my HP. I had a good time today with love.

My left hand though is giving me this ache. After so long not giving my all physically, I tortured the biceps and triceps today. Going with someone who could carry heavier weights then me fired me up and at the end of the day the aching seems to be staying there. I hope it would be gone by tommorow. A 6 click run maybe on the schedule tommorow.

Browns in black and white.

surely B would appreciate bulging biceps to cling on to everytime she sleeps on the bus..:)

2007-07-23T04:18:00.001+08:00

argh step on sthing sharp, foot pain, knn!!

2007-07-23T02:45:00.000+08:00

screwed up the washing machine and the whole kitchen is flooded. I made the mess, I shall clean it up.

Bought a new shoe today. I screwed up my white zara shoe, washed it and it turned pink. Like pussy pink. Pussy as in vagina.. I don't even want to go there. Wait...Of course I would. Not now, just not yet.

Its going to be 3 am soon, I'm due to wake up at 545am but I am still not asleep. Something must be wrong somewhere. I had a boring day, I tried to sleep most of it but I failed. Then at about 7 plus, Nazir asked me out. If that sounded wrong, read this. I wore my pink shoe and he said, "Kimak macam gay sial!" That is wrong dude. Damn wrong. Its metro. At least that is what I thought. Wani said its metro and I think she's right.

I pulled it off yesterday, white top, white skinnies anddddd pink Zara pointed sneaks.

Mat : "Bang kasot beli pat maner bang?"
Me: "Kao saper siak?!"
Mat: "Jgn gitu bang, tanyer ajer"
Me: "Zara.." ( Alights from train)

Word of advice, dont ask where someone bought that something, coz no matter how sincere you are, you still sound sarcastic. Its as if your mocking me shithead. But then again, who cares, its not everyday you see a guy wearing pink shoes..Or it is?

Strangely, I see many changes in me this past few days. I splash cash on skinnies and I actually bought one at Topman. I hated Topman, just because so many people are putting on Topman stuff. Its rather unappealing when you see some geeky punk wearing the same top as you though he could not pull it off as well as you. But heck I bought these white skinnies from em.

Then theres eurodance and trance. A metalhead listening to the likes of East Clubbers are just pretty sad. I don't know why but I seem to like those eurodance beats with the flamboyant twist of stereophonics and what have yous. They can have the most corny lyrics like "I;ve got 2 good reasons to make you ask for more, more, more!" and "I'm sending out an SOS, I'm sending it by SMS" to name a few. Just why am I loving these kind of music?!

Psychologist said people make drastic changes to get attention. But I dont know what the fish I am actually looking for. In a way I'm just lost with all that is happening with me. The best part is that I can't actually control it. Its like something else is making me do all these shit. They say, "get a grip on yourself", I say "Fuck off. You stinks"

B, have been very very very very very very very very very very very very very veryv very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very very,
busy with her production. She had a tough first day, and I told her things would definitely get better. She said most of the crew were being bitches and whores coz they wouldnt want to cooperate but only complain like bitchy humans would do. I told her to be patient and that maybe thats the way it is, and that its time for her to see who her real friends are. She was so tired that she went to sleep. The next day, she had another bad day too, I think. Then theres this fucking Mat who wants to get to know her in the library. She's an attractive lady so thats perfectly normal, she said she just said sorry and walk away. Always polite w strangers and courteous. Thats why I love her. We talked a while on the phone and she ranted about her day and as usual I excused myself from the peeps at town and lend her my good ear, tho its not so good coz she had to repeat several hundred times, and I told her again, that it will be a better day tommorow. True enough Sunday was a good day for her. She sounded cheerful and she had fun (well at least thats what I heard from her voice on the phone and thats what she wrote on her blog). And at the end of the day, she talked to me while I'm with my peeps at starbucks and sounded unhappy because I bought a new pair of shoes at Far East. Btw the salesgirl there was bloody cute, with a small cute voice and she's just 16. But too bad she's a smoker and a law breaker. You see, you cant smoke if you're under 18 in Singapore. I hope she get caught tommorow or some other day and quit smoking. Anyways B is unhappy because I spent again, which means I'm 50 bucks poorer and 50 bucks gone for our marriage fund. Maybe it shows that I dont want to marry her bad enough by doing this, thats why she is unhappy, but whatever it is I still do it which I think is bad but makes me feel good because after a shitty boring day at home, retail theraphy actually upped my mood a bit. Oh and I told her I missed her, and she didnt reply coz she said she's going to shower and I replied to her back "I ckp i miss u ajer tros tk reply" and she asked me what should she do abt it then. Which is a very good question coz I had no answer. hee.

and I came home and tried to be nice and wash my own clothes...

===================================================================
just talked 28 mins w her. talk nonsense and then she cry. i alwaes make her cry nowSaday. dunno why. ok lor i lazy to type liao. my urinal tracts cant stand ani longer, i hv to pee then i see wad i cud do. 1 more hr left before i can bathe and get ready for tekong. as im typing this, im sitting on the floor while the keyboard is on my eye level. my throat feel like shit and everiting feel like shit. shit is over rated by the way. dont be too fascinated by it.

ok some alone time with my black alabama water snake.

2007-07-20T14:04:00.000+08:00

"i'll never let go"

"Is there anything on earth or heaven would have made me so happy as to have made you mine long ago? & not less now than then, but more than ever at this time -- you know I would with pleasure give up all here & all beyond the grave for you"

"I was and am yours, freely & most entirely, to obey, to honour, love --& fly with you when, where, & how you yourself might & may determine. "

Honestly I don't even understand half of this crap up here..But I thought it was sweet. Well if its not then too bad. Love's busy w filming today, I hope everything goes smoothly..

B, nari I tk gi camp lagi tau. Apparently hp I nyer timing an hour late. By the time I bangun dah lambat, B. hohoh! Pls don't hamputz me! Jgn marah eh I tk msg you, tkmo ganggu you busy w filming. Take Care, B! Free call I la aite.

"Luv you many many!" --> quoting her. : D

2007-07-17T00:15:00.000+08:00

She's home and I'm happy.

It's always been you.

Hope you like buncit teddy.: )

Finally light at the end of the tunnel.

2007-07-13T18:44:00.000+08:00

it seems like such fun,
untill you lose what you had won.

2007-07-13T13:49:00.000+08:00

"Usah biarku bersendirian
Usah biar hati mu di tawan
Usah biar diri ku di sini
Seorang menunggu tanpa teman

Usah lepas genggaman tangan mu
Usah biar semua berlalu
Usah terlupa perasaan hati
Pertama kali kita bertemu

Usah lepaskan"

P/S: Off to never never land.

2007-07-08T20:40:00.000+08:00

The Run up

"Hands On" Approach

And we're off to never never land.....

I'm stuck with trance and rave music. Please help. Bring back the Metallica fan in me, the Iron Maiden fanatic, the guitar shredding priest-not...

I feel empty today. Saturday and Sunday filled with Football Manager 2007 ( i even created my character in the game and I play alongside Crouch in the Liverpool attack..What fantasy..) and Hot Shot Golf on the PSP..Golf?!! Whats up with me?! Hey its fun ok, go try it yourself.. Know your birdies from your eagles and your pars and what have yous.

Its been an unfulfilling weekend to say the least..Why do I look forward to it so too often..Pfft..Next weekend sentosa anyone?

2007-07-08T01:34:00.000+08:00

"Im sorry I didnt mean to call
but I could'nt fight it
I guess I was weak and could'nt even hide it
and so I surrender just to hear your voice.."

2007-07-06T06:11:00.000+08:00

FERNANDO TORRES.

First big name signing in a loooong time for the Reds..A whooping 26.5 million pounds. Its about time Liverpool splash some cash on world class players like him. The sad thing though, Luis Garcia had to be sold. The lightweight Spaniard, may not be the most consistent of performance, but Liverpool will sure miss his big game temperament and his knack for scoring crucial goals, and of course, his dazzling moments of magic. The kind of player who scores "a few special goals".

I hope Torres wont be a flop. Like Cisse or Nando. It has to work for Benitez this time. But of course, he needs to spend more. The likes of Malouda, Silva, David Villa, Iniesta and other of his first choice transfer targets must be snapped up soon. They need a world class winger. For the supply in Liverpool's midfield relies too much on the driving force of Stevie G and the openings created by Xabi Alonso. Pennant has been average at best while the left wing is non-existent. Buying David Beckham from Madrid would be a bad idea really, considering the amount of cross he puts into the danger zone in every game.

Enough bout soccer. I love my love. She's the world to me. Never would I ever want to hurt her. I love you, love.

"She is my suhaila, aila, aila, eh , eh" hohohoh!

2007-06-23T03:37:00.000+08:00

great day with my great sweetheart, just fulfilling her desire to be wet and wild at the beach..:) she loves the beach so much that i am considering to actually get a house at ecp or parkway when we get married..:D

just made my day seeing you splashing about in the water, enjoying my screwed up potato salad and just being right there next to you knowing nothing else except god that could separate us for that very moment. Priceless.

my sepet lil princess who i just cant stop loving, each and every moment spent with you i just hope it would never end.

Just me and my favourite girl.

"ABANG DATANG SAYANG..." hoho!

2007-06-21T00:17:00.000+08:00

Kadang-kadang dalam kehidupan seharian kita ni kan, ader la ternampak kelakuan yang kurang sopan. Ader yang betol-betol tak senonoh sampai kita terpikir, "Siak ah ni anak betol ker tidak?" Now lets take a look at some of the darnest thing people can do.(Adapted from Ujang)

KORANG MEMANG BUKAN MANUSIA NORMAL KALAU :

1)Tengah pat Macdonalds menjamu selera dengan sekuat hati dan segan silu kentut dengan kuat sekaligus mengeluarkan bau ala-ala loji pencerna najis. Tu takper lepas tu dengan penuh ceria ckp dengna members pat sebelah "BAEEEEKKK PUNYAAA, BOB!"

2)Korang nampak seorang nenek ni terkengkeng-kengkeng angkat barang-barang pasar, tros dengan sekuat hati korang sindir "KERJA KERAS NAMPAK, CIK?" lepas tu dengan sardinnya korang overtake dier jalan and duduk tempat kosong yg terakhir dalam bas yg sesak tu. Besar punya musibat.

3)Dua tiga orang jiran tetangga korang berdiri sejauh mungkin dari korang dalam lif dan dengan machonya korang kencing berdiri dalam lif. Gila siol!

4)Korang sudah "buang" time amek corner 60 teros cedera parah, tapi nasib baik ader motorcyclist lain yang baik hati nak hantar korang gi hospital, tapi korang meraung-raung suro dier antar korang gi kedai 4D tangkap "10 big, 10 small" dulu.

5)Time dentist visit, korang dengan penuh konsentrasi keluarkan segala kahak dan hingus pekat bila doktor gigi tu setakat suro korang meludahkan air kumuran ajer.

Kesimpulannya, kalau korang pernah buat salah satu dari perkara pat atas ni, ader chance korang ni bukan manusia normal. Try check tengkuk tu maner tau ader paku ker, cecelah rambut tu ader screw ker atau korang just plain alien, mcm Mr Bean.

2007-06-20T06:14:00.000+08:00

ok i only have like 1 minute to blog so I'm gonna rush.

I had a great evening with darling yesterday, having dinner at Techno, which I think has the best western menu and the best tasting western food in SG. REALLY SHIOK sia after so long never eat there. The half bbq chicken rice and coleslaw was awesome I tell you. 5 popcorns for Techno!

And then I teman my dear of mine while she do all this production thing. I very nice rite? I know..Hhahaha! Its a happy day because I can see her and have her by my side..
: D

oK its already past 2 minutes after this line. I actually sprinted to catch the bus yesterday, yes sprinted not jog. Still got the burst tho, havent tried to really give 100% to a chase.

I missed the feeling when I ran so fast, that my leg is actually moving faster than I imagined, like after you accelerate a car through a downslope and let it "freewheel".

A moment of "no control" but thats when you're at your top speed.

I want to chase a ball and get it before anyone else and end up not scoring again. I miss the agony..ahahah! fast but no finishing.

2007-06-17T21:40:00.000+08:00

doing physical labour is one thing.

having stacks of foldable chairs landing on ur right ankle is another.

going home shagged and smelly is one thing.

having no gd night wishes or the normal iloveyous is another.

i understand.

i love you.

2007-06-16T22:57:00.000+08:00

listen up y'all..

my lil missy is needing some actor/actresses for her upcoming production project..any budding actor/actresses out there who thinks he/she can act, let me get this straight - DREAM ON. hohoh! joking la, ok look at this webby :

http://www.mandy.com/1/cast3.cfm?v=22728856

no i'm not acting, the production house cant accept my demand. but for those of you who aspire to be a star, this is your chance..

"Abang dulu pon pegi audition gini jugak time muda-muda..Tu Jalan Ampas saner, kau tau?"

2007-06-14T23:02:00.000+08:00

its just one of the rare, carefree days. i took a day leave just so I could watch 2 movies with her today. Oceans Thirteen which was one of the best movies I've seen this year and a fairly average but entertaining Men In White.

I looked at her a lot today. Just sitting there beside her watching her (and listening of course) while she talked about her friends, school and just anything under the sun.The thing about her is that, I could just sit all day long listening to her talk, not saying a word and just watch her twitch her face while adjusting her scarf or observe how her thick lower lips move and being close enough to actually smell her sweet breath. And only she can do that. Only her, a solitary soul.

The one thing I really liked about today is the peace of mind I got. Honestly, I don't know what really happened to me since posted to Tekong. I used to be this whiny infantry soldier but ever since I'm posted to this slack vocation, surprisingly I've been appreciative of little things like having to wait for someone after prayers - which shows that you have company. Ok that maybe nonsensical but I seem to be mellowed down with the rage in me eversince. Maybe this is how one feel when they turn 21? I dont know, but I am sure I do have more patience and am feeling happier nowadays. Much happier.

Though there are 1001 things to actually think about, I could just put everything aside (apart from the thought of Suhaila Said) and have a peace of mind for that solitary minute, for me to regroup and gain my composure back.

Talked about the future with love and it was funny and heart warming. Suhaila and me, the thing about us is that we both enjoy simple simple things in life. Lil things that cost mere cents. Though we do splurge at times on clothes or what have yous but I realise its these lil cheapo stuff that we actually enjoy so much.

Kesederhanaan. A thing that we share in common. We both come from middle incomed family (though I claim I'm the King of Bawean Island, it counts for nothing in Singapore. Rupiah still weaker than Sing dollars :p) and I think its important for a couple to understand and accomodate to each others financial..err ok let me say that in Malay. Amat penting untuk sepasang kekasih/suami isteri agar memahami kemampuan dari segi kewangan pasangan mereka agar keharmonian dan kesejahteraan hubungan tidak terjejas.

Yang penting, sayang mau lebih...Saaayaang awk! huahahaha!

This post might be random, but the point is, I am happy with Suhaila Said and in general! yeay!

"Setiap malam
Kutunggu panggilanmu
Resah hatiku menanti
Walaupun sehari takku dengar suaramu
Hati rindu...
Kuterasa dunia ini bagai terhenti"

2007-06-11T21:44:00.000+08:00

the gym fever is back. had much time to spare so went to Taurus Coy gym for a lil workout..the gd ting abt tekong gym is that, there's virtually no one there..so you have every inch of the gym for your partner and yourself.

while Mr Woo (yes thats his name, as in John Woo or Wooo's dat girl, lalala lalaa! ahahha!~) was pumping 20 - 25 kg of dumb bells i rather stick with the machines..Slow and steady ar eh.

right leg is very weak..have to do more running to get it back in shape..cant even sprint properly yet, but dreaming of playing soccer..hoho!

i am definitely looking "rounder" than before..met Idham in the ferry, kimek, gemok siak lu beb! its standard thing la i guess..Go Tekong, confirm will gain weight..

Morning breathe in fresh sea breeze.
Eat nice brekkie.
Get free lunch.
Have tea break.
Go home eat nice dinner with family in front of tv.

How not to gain weight..Not that its a bad thing for me tho. Only that the 6 packs are slowly disappearing, the sharp jaws starts to round, the "rippling" biceps dont ripple no more..hohoho! neymind, can work on that..time being, let me just enjoy, the tekong breeze..: D

The "Rippest" I've been so far - During BMT.

2007-06-11T11:30:00.001+08:00

"people are unhappy coz they have too many wants and too little patience."

"hadapi dengan senyuman, semua yang terjadi, biar terjadi
hadapi dengan tenang jiwa, semua kan baik-baik saja"

ILY LOVE.

2007-06-09T00:42:00.000+08:00

i want it as much as you do.

but because i love you too much to allow myself to jeopardise your future.

its just so hard to explain.

i wish i could fulfil our wishes.

urgh.this is killing me.

2007-06-03T19:53:00.000+08:00

my super long weekend is disrupted with duty yesterday. I came home this morning feeling a lil weary.. Two more duty this week and one more at the end of the month.. Its duty, duty, duty! and therefore no one can accuse me of not serving my country, alright.

been a good weekend actually. Some quality time with the missus just hanging around vivo, walking about aimlessly, watching her and her silly, clumsy antics. Like i said to her before, if I have a daughter, the lil daddy's girl will resemble her mom so much that I just have to look forward to come home from work.

I'm actually missing her so much already, must set a day to meet her liao.

I'm still stoning from sleeping the whole afternoon. The sleep inertia if you sleep the whole noon is terrible i tell you.

2007-05-27T16:01:00.000+08:00

everytime i hear these 3 Firehouse hits, sweet memories just came flooding back of me and you..

not even a bit of it is forgotten. Its so crystal clear, I still feel that warmth of your palm, the scent of your shampooed hair which sticks on the left shoulder of my white TKSS uniform, even after I reached home and that "spaghetti-in-the-bus" stunt i pulled off..

and after all these years, it still amazes me the things I'd do for you and the way you actually made me do it. The power of love they say.

Yesterday night, I am trully scared. Been so long since I've been that scared before, but how could I bare to let you take the ride alone. I just cant. It's just not right, for a man who says "I'd die for you" to let his love take on a funfair ride alone, just because of his fear of these rides.

Love, you're just as special as I am to you and though I'm really not very good with these words, I hope i do make it up for the things I do, to show you what you really meant to me.

thousands of times I've said it but, if there's one thing I really meant everytime I say it, its these 3 words.

I love you.

2007-05-22T20:06:00.000+08:00

helped the cupcake to do her blogskin..adjusted the pic bt she's still not happy abt the pic..

first to selarang, then to Tekong..now i will be there for the rest of my NS life..i presume..

friends are in abundance in Tekong, those from TKSS, poly, primary school, those from SISPEC, and the RSM is my uncle, but i rather stay invisible now, since not many actually realise i am the new guy there..

Maybe its the hustle and bustle of the Tekong Ops Room. "Hustle and bustle" only at the start of the day la..Its like the central nervous system of Tekong, but on the contrary its pretty slack for a "central nervous system".

I am currently attached to the Training Management dept, where the bookings of training facilites, namely "outfield" facilities, eg, hand grenade range, BIC ground have to go through me. Have to brief the conducting officers and teach them how to operate certain stuff at the various grounds and at the end of it, I have to go a proper ground check to make sure the training facilities are in a satisfactorily clean and workable condition.. The best thing is, if the facilities are not up to MY standards of satisfactory, I have the power to recall the unit and "REQUEST" the officers to get his men to clean the mess up, up to MY standard...but i dont give a shit really..I know how tired those trainees and recruits are, as long as its not a junkyard out there, I'l just sign my rank and name below the officer's.

theres more to it actually, coz I might be doing SeaFerry too..Which means doing plannings of ferry timings to and from Tekong Ferry Terminal and SAF ferry terminal in Changi..that looked tedious, with the accounts and such..but i'll learn..

its been pretty slack these 2 days..not doing much..but mind you, the $350 service allowance i get, is just perfect for the job i;ve been doing for the 2 days.. sadly, more shit are coming through, but I'm not complaining, bearing the fact i've gotten into more shit before..but then again, I might be complaining coz I have the right to do so like how i have the right to treat NS like another shithole and be negative about it..

to Rose, i just cant look at NS in a positive way when it is a shithole and thats the only thing i'm so positively sure about. so thanks but no thanks.

i miss my darling..and tekong make me miss her more.

2007-05-19T00:56:00.000+08:00

another of those Natinal Service preachers..are they like paid by the govt or sthing? maybe ar, $200 per month to snoop around nsmen blogs and see if they're ranting about hw bad army life can be..

pfft. tak paham kan? takper..they will never get it. they just bloody dont so i'm not gonna waste my time.

aniwaes, i went back to sispec few hours ago.. got my stuff all packed up.. dusty and all, my pillowcase got mould? ewww..very rabak sia..i opened my cupboard and a note dropped in front of me. its Colin, the first OOC of the latest batch and he was posted to CMPB as a clerk too i presume, well good luck to him too..the armskoteman saw me, "saaaap look who's back.."

armskoteman: "rabak wai kao takder..kerja bersepah sia..naseb belambak ooc siol, kalau tak sergeant major nangis sia"

bukan cakap ooc duduk goyang kaki eh pat coy line. point being as long as ur an ns men, ahhh forget it..

apparently the guy from Fantastic Four is in the OOC bunk too..Member pon OOC jugak..Packed my shit up and shoved everything into the duffle bag. I had to dispose my boots and sports shoes coz really not enough space. So now i am left with 2 pairs gortex boots for the rest of my ns life which is more than enough really.

tommorow is the date, i miss her so much! cant wait for tommorow!

p/s: life is ours we live it our way..

2007-05-08T06:33:00.000+08:00

its narcissism week..i declare..its 630 and i cant sleep coz of a niggling headache and nw that its gone i dont feel like sleeping no more..its sunshine and i dont want to spend the remaining few days of my MC sleeping like a log..

I have a new obsession now..Maplestory..I'm hooked to the game, and the fact that my ex TKSS buddy, Mr Goh Wee Keat aka "the guy who hates to shower in the morning but become a much more hygienic guy after being brainwashed by me for 2 years sitting beside me in 4G", has a high leve character in the game.. He's like showering me w thousands of mesos(currency of the game)and lots of nice items which are rare to find..Thus, i'm more enthu, since this game is also free, unlike the previous MMORPG that I indulged in previously, Pristontale. To those who arent familliar w the acronym, MMORPG means Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games.

Enough bout games..I browsed through some pics, like I always do when I'm bored, and its funny how my hairstyle actually evolved over the years..Lets take a peek shall we, from my bad hair days..to the clean crew cut the army has to offer.

Starts w the legendary Armani haircut with the corny moustache..Gelling is a chore..and of course, the tembam cinonet girlfriend who smells good although she just ended chemistry class but insisted that she's smelly and perspiring..

Graduated from TKSS and keeping it long is the "IN" thing..Long and straight w a friggin fringe...Mcm king of fighter siakk! hohoh!

Same old, same old long but slightly maintained..I miss this kiddo..Her name is Putri and she loves me and will complain that her bro bullied her to me when I visited her in Negeri Sembilan few years back.."Dier buat kiter tau." Miss you putri..

Jeng jeng jeng! Mullet beb, mullet! In the last 2 years of poly..It seemed to be THE HAIRCUT then..so i tried it.."blakang mullet eh cik" saaaap, dier bagi baek punya mullet..

After graduation from Poly..trying something new again..Was flipping the magazine and David Setan Gondol Beckham had to appear.."Cik, mcm si dekni arh, boleh jadi tak?"
"Lu hensem semua boleh jadi punya" the pakcik exclaimed.
"Cik puji2 kena bayar lebih eh?" I enquired..I rilli onli have 10 bucks and the nearest ATM is faaar away..stop it siak..

And for the first time after enlisted, i got the "Marines haircut". Looks like cock i swear..I tried to improve it by having a slightly "longer" top.."Cik, atas jgn potong byk nah eh..nk buat spike ah.." pakcik pon gerek punya..

And currently, mr botak-tek..kinda like it this way coz its convenient and of course, because the lady love me this way..hhohoho!

so long and good night..no, morning..:D

2007-05-05T01:42:00.000+08:00

sometimes i wonder how i pull off so many impossible things just to spend time with her..

and how i somehow managed to squeeze, elope, or do just any trick in the book to get that extra day, few hours just to be there by her side..

but somehow, these bloody fucking legs just cant do it no more...fuck the fucking cast.

i cant believe this, but i rather be in camp right now, doing shit for the army.

fucking leg.

2007-05-02T20:35:00.000+08:00

21 years ago, exactly on this day, 1020hrs, a legend was born.

Happy Birthday to you..

In the 21 years, you've been blessed with the simplest but sweetest love, handful of achievements, shitloads of friends, countless bittersweet memory, a family that sticks w you through everything and an alter ego as good looking as me.

Be thankful for everything you have from the major things like a love-life second to none and a wonderful family, to the petty things like the rippling biceps and your supernatural ability to stay ordinary.

You must stay strong, positive (tho more often than not your the opposite, improve on this dammit!), be driven like you always do before the army take that away from you, stay focused and be a good man.

Whatever thay may say, you are still one in a million, and whatever happens, you will always have me and I will always have you.

"Im your dream, make you real
Im your eyes when you must steal
Im your pain when you cant feel

While you,
You're my mask,my cover, my shelter

Im inside open your eyes
Im you."

Happy Birthday Abdul Ghani

Stay strong, or I will devour you.

Your struggling alter ego,
Arjuna Satria

2007-05-01T19:11:00.000+08:00

its not even 2nd May and i've already gotten like 20 gifts from someone who meant everything to me..

1)Ipod Nano 4GB (Poddy)

2)Cute lil white pouch for Poddy

3)A cute green Happy Tree Friends T-shirt. (hohoh violent!)

4)1 Black Giordano top with "Arjuna Satria" inscripted at the back. (coool)

5)Black, Lime Green, Sky Blue, Red ankle socks w "Arjuna Satria" inscripted on it.

6)Spongebob Towel (karate!)

7)Gillete Fusion Blade (sweeet)

8)Body Shop Exfoliating Skin Towel

9)Body Shop for Men shower gel

10)A cute lil mug w lil boy w small dick on it (hahah its cute!)

11)Cup cover aka "tit simulator"

12)30 day worth of inspirational quotes on die-cuts windows (this is really meaningful)

13)SEX FOR DUMMIES! (I'm a sexpert but who cares!)

14)Sex Instructor Card (I'm a license sex instructor now, and you will be my first student sweetheart, ohohoh!)

15)Hunky Chicken wire photoholder

16)Limited edition postcard of "The Adventures of Arjuna Satria"

17)A pair of Spiderman 3 tickets, to be redeemed at own time and location! (my favourite movie, coz its the very first movie we watched together)

18)Sweet lunch of New York New York Pizza

19)Mud choco Birthday cake from The Royals

20) The best DIY birthcard I've ever got. to date.

to cap it all off, I had the most wonderful time with my sweetheart at Marina South through the drizzle and the lil game she had planned out for me before I could get my hands on each of the different 20 presents!

Thank you sweetheart for everything, you made my day today! And you my dear are the only one that can make me smile for ear to ear even without saying a word..

and its another pleasant surprise because the present no. 21 will be given on 2nd May itself..

theres no better way to spend my last day as a 20-year-old other than to sit under a shelter with you playing games I so sucked at!

I love you darling...: D

2007-04-29T02:52:00.000+08:00

the tkss guys ask me out today, since its been a boring boring week..Pamiao wanted to get something to eat, and so off we went to Changi to get some food before heading to Changi beach to eat "di tepi pantai dgn angin sepoi2 bahasa". Apart from the few matreps having bbq around the area it was a fairly peaceful evening... We talked about uni, and the past tkss shit we've done..The day Nas took a scorching test tube and putting it on Fozi Nathan's neck and casually asking "Panas tk fozi"..Shortly after Fozi screamed in pain and said something lar "Kao giler kaper siak Nas.." and hurled a volley of profanities to our beloved Nas..Kao pon tk betol ar Nas..Naseb anak orang tu tk mampos...Hampeh!

To think of it, TKSS is just one of the best place I've been and not to mention the best time of my teenange life, where I made many life long friends..Is it just me or TKSS just have this brotherhood tradition that most of the guys in TKSS are just very very close, throughout their lives..

its been a good evening..and I'm looking forward to next week..:D

its raining nw and the air is so cool and minty..haha..just opened the front door to pick up the news paper and does it just feels great on a raining sunday to be in the warmth and comfort of your home..heaven...

well to start off ur sunday here's a video of Team Red Raven during the SIP day in the midst of the busy SIP schedule..I just cant figure out, what the hell we were thinking making these stupid videos..

Ok, here's the deal, Fazli Janggut is our guest star this time, in the Documentary : Entity Singapura..Pak Fazli is a paranormal practitioner who can see "things" and even when blindfolded he could "draw" whatever he saw in the room...While I gave the "host of the indonesian cooking programme at 6pm on Suria", a run for her money, Pak Fazli on the other hand became our one and only host on this 1 episode documentary series..Voted as "Dokumentari Paling Kelakar Seram" in this years Pesta Perdana I proudly present to you...Entiti Singapura...

2007-04-27T22:46:00.000+08:00

you know sometimes boredom makes people do stupid stuff...i was browsing through my files looking at my resume and such and stumbled upon many many videos I made during SIP last year....and its wicked siak, the way we thought of such stuff..hohoho! aite so from today I will publish bit by bit, the crazy shit we did during SIP...

to start with..why dont you guys have a plate of WHOSBUTTSTANK, specially brought to you by the good fellows of Team Red Raven..and check out our drummer...to any bands out there looking for an out-and-out metal drummer, you've got your man righhhht here...

and dun mind the "bad hair days" aite...yea i noe, mullets looked disgusting on me...hahaha!
but...i like it...hohohoh!! and give credit to the cameraman Rino, who was doing all sorts of funny stunts to get the angle right..hoho!

and of course, the part 2 of the video..where the drummer (Fazli) goes berserk...he thinks Hoobastank is satanic...i tried to convince him but, he just dont listen..well...

have a gd weekend people...and snugglepants, im missing you...

2007-04-27T00:25:00.000+08:00

spent the thursday watching episodes after episodes of chappelle show..and of course, The 70s show which is blardy funny...

everytime i'm going to sleep all those thoughts at the back of my mind crept in, which explains why i couldnt sleep..i'll get over this..

the big day is coming..period.

its friday today..isnt that quick..

my head is groggy. and the songs on my Imeem, i just love this main song..My mind have this relationship w music..I can remember things from the past via the music i listen to sometimes..

Like how I can remember the times when i eat spaghetti on the bus with, miss jambubabe back in seconday 4, when I listen to Firehouse's I live my life for you. its so clear, i can smell the spaghetti spices aroma that day..

Remember, we bought it at Mac at Clementi Interchange..
And when you got so cold and u have goosebumps..

And when ur hair smells of Pantene shampoo early in the morning?

I never forget any of those untill all these years..

Should one day i go senile or something, lost my memory, god forbids, play those Firehouse songs..Shampoo your hair with pantene shampoo..Take me on those long no.14 bus rides..And keep saying the "iloveyous"..

coz you're one thing i'd never forget.

2007-04-25T04:40:00.000+08:00

the letter came and i was in they said..Mechanical Engineering (direct entry to 2nd year.)

was quite elated there for a moment and it only takes less than a minute for me to realise the dilemma it would be...

Operation "Happily-Ever After" (Plan A)

Primary objective : Get married to "codename : Beautiful"

Secondary Objective: (a) ORD and collect Pink IC
(b) Submit resume and search for work
(c) Start work within 3 months of ORD
(d)Minimise expenditure
(e)Stabilise financially, increase "marriage funds"
(f)Enquire more religious knowledge
(g)Stabilise mind, ethics, soul, mentally prepared for life as a husband
(h)Plan a simple but memorable wedding day
(i)Shake the kadi's hand and make her your lawful wife
(j)Be the best husband you could ever be(romantic, loving.etc)
(k)Have a gd sex life..: D

Approximate Accomplishment Time : 3 years earliest, if everything goes to plan.

Plan B
Study in uni, get a degree and get married at the age of 27-28 earliest, which is like 6-7 years from now.

And i dont want to wait that long either.

A Perfect Resolution

Proceed with Plan A, marry that irresistable lady of yours, launch your Licensed Aircraft Maintenance Engineer carreer, straighten up your life, pursuit the degree on a part time basis after everything is smoother.

Being the eldest, I feel I have this big responsibility upon me to launch as quick as possible. As much as my parents encouraging me to pursuit university and not minding the financials of it, I feel the obligations to lessen their burden, let them have it easier after 21 years of giving me all they could.

On the other hand, I wanted to straighten this life up for me. And to make everything fall in place is for me to have someone I love right there with me everyday, tying the sacred bond with her, being with her for the rest of my life. That for me will get things right in place, a sense of security, and nothing is more secure than having someone you've been loving all your life as your wife..

I need this security. Ever since I met her and fell in love with her, went to poly, worked hard, its for this. To be able to have a good life with enough cash for the family and for a life with her. Face it, money cant buy happiness, but you need it no doubt to put food on the table and to shelter from the rain and shine.

Spending another 3 years is fruitful to get that piece of paper which states BaE of Mechanical Engineering.. Its worth every 3 damn years, no doubt about it. That degree will do wonders and boost chances of employment much much more..Only if, I'm not committed to anyone, if I dont have a plan already in place.

I dont want to distrupt that plan and system which is going pretty well and is promising.

I've got all the ingredients to make the plan a success.

1) The diploma is in my hands.
2)Uncle in SIA is waiting for my resume and ORD date.(I hope this wont screw up)
3)The most important of all, she's right here with me after all these years.

You, my dear, is my utmost priority.

Its pretty good tho that they offered me a place w/o interviews or what-have-yous, I must be doing something right all these years. Or isit just too easy to get into an engineering course in NTU? Either way, I'm happy.

Lets just leave this to Allah...Allah, i want her to be my wife, please help me..Please, like you always do when I'm in deep trouble.

2007-04-24T03:12:00.000+08:00

she just never fail to make amends with her tender loving care, cute lil clumsy way that will only melt my heart..

its tough being the stronger one, physically what more mentally, but what we went through together is just an epic love story..we're stars in a movie that people didnt watch..all for all these 5 years, I never exchange it with anything - even a chance to quit the army...: D
Its just too precious, you, your time with you, I can never emphasize more just how vital you are in my life..

we have gone through this a million times, gone to hell and back again, this is just like the usual serving we always had, we'll dig in and gobble it up..

and the end of the day, your my one and only Crimson Princess.

ILY more.

liverpool

2007-04-22T00:17:00.000+08:00

and the third spot is more of less confirmed for the Merseysiders. Two goals from Dirk Kuyt is enough to give liverpool all 3 points..

On the Italian front though, I hope Juventus will be promoted soon enough..Then they can win the Scudettu yet again...Holidays over Roma, the Bianconeris will be up your neck..

I've done w Prisonbreak Season 1. I managed to convince myself that I'm not a genius like Michael Schofield, coz if that's so, prolly, I'm not serving NS right now..Now its for the Season 2 and Heroes seems to be very interesting too...Maybe that too, though I'm not sure where to get the DVD even if its out yet..

Pippo Inzaghi, the player they love to hate...Johan Cruyff said " He can't play football, he's just in the right position always" Still, he's one of my favourite footballers around..Those crucial goals he scored for Milan, Juventus and Italy throughout the years just prove his worth...Forza Super Pippo..

happy-not

2007-04-20T21:08:00.000+08:00

i dont want to be happy.

don't even make me.

tagged and such

2007-04-18T16:15:00.000+08:00

"and i was tagged to do this
to list 6 weird things about myself
and i have to assign 6 people to continue'" -->taken from netty's blog, hhoho!

1)I named my crutches and some normal people said it's weird
2)I'm good looking considering other people think so too - damn weird
3)Yawns like a bear tho my size is more like..a bear in Africa?
4)Have lotsa childhood scars on knees and this "boyish" scar on me face.
5)Thinks Suhaila's breath smells alcoholic
6)I am scared of the dark, and not many men who went thru NS is.

5 times

2007-04-18T06:01:00.000+08:00

"i had so many things to do..
too many things to accomplish,
if only i had 5 lives,
then i'd be born in 5 different countries,
eat as much as i can till i'm 5 times full,
work 5 different jobs,
be 5 times richer,
and during the 5 times...
fall in love with the same person..

You.."

Something i dug from my previous blogs but it still touched my heart nonetheless..Hope it touched yours and brighten up your day today, sweetheart.

Prisonbreak and such

2007-04-17T17:33:00.000+08:00

last sunday the boys came by...had a lil hooha regarding this leg thingy i've got and nice of em to bring me out, get some dinner at Jln Kayu. This western restaurant there..its dope, gd food, better dessert, and gd ambience..and i feel more comfy now going out on crutches and w them cast on..and as usual those clowns made me laugh quite a bit, they're different class of course, the way we joke, oh well only us tkss boys would understand...its so "inside" that even the inside people wudnt understand it sometimes...

baby got into her new school...I hope everthings gonna be good bt as usual, she intimidated and all that, well she is always intimidated..its scary really with the potential she's got, if only she would realise her ability, she could do some real damage..she's a bright one..just like me..hohoh.

been a lil tinge bored at home and all this slacking made my head heavy, made throats cough and the nose runny...can use some fresh outside air..cant wait for the weekend baby..and i've got the prisonbreak-crap onto me too now..im hooked onto the way michael schofield thinks..great actor, bt the plot just seem to thickens everytime..
maybe i could dilute it a lil with Raymond everytime my mind got tired of watching Prisonbreak...I could use some anime too..

as u guys noe, this bloody blog cant be viewed on IE..its the damn codes, and I hv no idea hw to rectify it..so just use firefox..its better than IE anyways.. and No, i dont work for Firefox..

darling...the pillar wont crumble, it'll stand like its always been..

talkin abt crumble, i can use some banana crumble and icecream w honey..

and it shed its skin..

2007-04-15T16:47:00.000+08:00

love's complaining about me not doing anything much bt instead complaining to her of being bored..she suggested a new skin..

I didnt thought of it, but now that I came to realise, my blogskins rather old..been sometime since i've got the time to change it..and so here it is..

anyways, i had a great day yesterday with my sweetheart..yes its been sometime since I had a great day, and yesterday was one of those sweet lil times with her and I don't want it to end, bt of course, it had to end..

and my lil papillon got to see my two new buddies, Grimjow and Jaggerjack, the three of em got acquainted almost immediately and its nice knowing my darling got along w my new buddies well.hoho!

well it was the first time i took the bus in 2 weeks and its pretty embarassing w the crutches and all, but my dear missy just had to say something to make it all worth the trouble getting onto the bus - "Eiiyy, besarnyee!" refering to my triceps..doesnt that just made my day, that after all that slacking at home that lil bulging thingy still got my lady's attention..hohoh! maybe im gonna name my tricep as well..just maybe..

as u all have read on her blog, (tsk, korang baca blog dier dulu ajer seh) we went to have lasagne and pasta at pizza hut, bought cakes at Royals and CHOCO BANANA at Secret Recipe! That thingy was damn delicious arr..still have one in my fridge together with a choco mud cake..Melts in your mouth i tell you..Just like the cake Marie baked in Everybody Loves Raymond..

I bought Prisonbreak Season 1 dvd, since i've never really followed it, bt people keeps talking about hw good it is, well i'll give it a run then.

its like during the early days all over again..when I get super excited over every date with her, and when i discreetly punched the air and said "YESSA!" to myself everytime she smiled or said yes to the next date..

its true when The Eagles said Love Will Keep Us Alive..

it did kept me alive, on many occasions..hoho!
I think all the whey proteins and body building crap i took during poly days eventually showed up now in the form of the rippling triceps..

like nabil said, "get big or die trying"...NOT!

and i would never got to worry who's gonna take care of me.: )

ILY!

crutches

2007-04-14T00:40:00.000+08:00

and i was bored to death..

then i realised, my crutches arent named..and i always confused myself which is left and which is right, though left feels right sometimes..not that it matters though but still, boredom makes minute things like this significant..

and so i named the left one..She's called Grimjow..and a poem etched to it..

"Be as the waves, Become my shield"

While the right crutch is named, Jaggerjack..His mantra too was etched(or maybe written in permanent ink) on it..

"Be as the lighting, Become my blade"

and thus the sacred bond between them, gelled by my reiatsu, enabled a miracle to happen - i could move from place to place without hopping on one leg..

Grimjow Jaggerjack will be my gd friend for sometime it seems...

and tommorow, they will follow me on my long awaited date with my darling...

p/s: excuse this crappy post please..im intoxicated, with milk.

2007-04-11T02:35:00.000+08:00

nenek is in hospital since yesterday and this house is so so so quiet withour her around. It kills me everytime we have to go home at 8pm because the nurses switched off the lights as the visiting hours are over..that lil small puny figure of her on the relatively large hospital bed all tucked in ready to sleep while i make my way towards the exit after kissing her gd nite..:*(

i hope she'll be out by tommorow..i am missing her presence her at home, her lil naggings and laughter at everything cute and hw she keeps saying "menyampah lah aku dgn si mr bin ni!" everytime when i fight for the controls w her to keep Mr Bean on tv while she wants to watch some Filipino soap opera..

mish her loads and i will do aniting to bring her home asap..apparently she have a scan tommorow at 8 and if they find the scan to be negative( that no stones/particles which cause her kidney infection) then she'll be discharged..

its been 2 days of my visiting her despite being on crutches and she keeps insisting i stay at home..and i didnt realise ppl on crutches invite so many stares by nurses who should be accustomed to these kinda people aniwaes..how come last time when i walk around and saw ppl on crutches they just seemed normal, no biggie, bt now when im on crutches i realise ppl stare at me as if i have my intestines dragging on the ground...cmon, wheres the love y'all! sorry bout dat, gt a lil carried away..

I JUST WANT MY NENEK BACK HOME LA!! so i can talk to her in the wee hours of the morning....and so i am NOT WORRIED! this is how my parents and grans feel when i went for the op maybe..

and i miss love..

2007-04-08T01:27:00.000+08:00

its learning new songs on my guitar for god knows wad..

doraemon, and more stupid episodes of doraemon..

honeystars thats making me cough like mad..

and learning new moves/stunts w my crutches..

now who said MC was fun again..

am as bored as a nun in a porno theatre.

"it isnt to hard to see we're in heaven.."

aaaaitttee...

2007-04-05T00:39:00.000+08:00

somethings are more important than a torn ligament..

somethings are just more important than accompanying you the whole daty.

somethings are just more important than bloody you, you fucking selfish piece of useless crap...

can you bloody wake up from your dreams and stand by yourself like you used to do..\

He dont need no one..

No bloody one..

He works alone.

Solitude is the best medicine.

2007-04-04T20:05:00.000+08:00

love's not really in the right shape, now..she's dead worried about her atok, who's in ICU and hell i would be too if i were i her shoes..

atok will be fine k, sweetheart..he will recover soon syg..doa utk atok together k darling? Insyallah he'll be fine, k sweetie..:(

poor love is freaking out, i understand dear..calm down and go visit atok k syg.

being on this temporary cast is not as easy as i imagined it to be..movement restricted. i cant move around for nuts..from the bedroom to the kitchen is already a hassle for me..now i truly understand hw it feels like to lose a limb..its bad, very very bad..to a point i got so irritated of my disability to move that i wanna smash this bloody right leg to the wall..its getting to me i tell you..

today, my grandpa showered me for the first time since i was 5? hahaha..i was in my shorts and sitting in the toilet w a metal "al-fresco" chair, while atok showered me.."macam mandikan gajah". rubbed me head, just like hw he used to shower me when i was much much younger...thank u atok..ought to appreciate this old man of mine more..
he literally gave everything i wanted back then when i was young and he doesnt stop even when i'm now a 20 year old young man..he sure does love me..

this ligament op thingy actually opened my eyes, that all this while, there are actually lotsa people who cherish my presence and is willing to die for me, like hw i am willing to die for them...

i miss my darling..very much...

2007-04-02T22:23:00.000+08:00

and they cut me open,

put me to sleep

and give goblets to ease the pain..

the ops done, its a scary one, needles arent that bad..but still! I dont wanna be poked again..poke yes, nt to be poked at..get it..

felt useless..kinda powerless for a moment..things like walking up a flight of stairs, going to the loo..its pretty hard..believe you me, i still have the traces of the GA in me, for im still groggy, drowsy...my heads heavy and im gonna make this short..

nite.

2007-04-01T15:04:00.000+08:00

or so they say...

2007-03-18T08:55:00.000+08:00

"Poems don't light the room in pink for you

Roses don't freshen up the air in the room for you

Strawberry shortcakes don't repel mosquitoes for you

But ME

I'd do ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING for you..

sweet poetic words arent my forte.

Being sweet is."

I.L.Y

2007-03-16T21:00:00.000+08:00

its a night when i had to unleash my temper to my two sisters..(for bleach viewers imagine 1st Squad Captain unleashing his zanpaktou)

nureha quietly try to hide her report card, bt she forgot that her bro is the liar of all liars in the house and no one could like to a great liar...(well at least in this household) and so she had bad results for the mid semester..hw bad? dont even ask..
its bad enough for me to bellow at her, make her cry, right in front of a plate of rice she's eating..(thats very mean, i know, i just realise that)

i just dont get it why she cant improve after all the bloody naggings..she cant think for herself that if she fails she'll be doomed and the future will be bleak for her..and i dont want a bleak future from her..

and so i nagged and nagged trying to knock some sense into her..

i think academically, i've been a decent role model for both my siblings..im not asking them to emulate me, just bloody do well in whatever they're doing now..
and my mom never fail to manjakan this bloody 15 yr old kid..that doesnt make things definitely..

"i dont care hw mak loves you more than me..(or so it seems) i just want you to bloody have a decent future if not better than mine...i'm not home that often nor am i as close knitted to you two like other people..i don't talk to you guys that often nor am i nice to the both of you when you asked for favours..but that doesnt mean i dont love you guys..doesnt mean i dont bloody care..if you guys just understand what i am getting at..please, work hard, stay safe, be a bloody virgin till you get married so you'll have a gd future and not turn into rowdy minahs..no matter hw fucked up i am to you guys, i'm still your bloody big bro who only want the best for you bloody women.."

so please god keep them safe and well..for these 2 of the 7 people i'd die for...

My two "lovely" sisters in orange..that girl w/o tudung is my cuzzin..realise hw these women have chubby cheeks? it runs in the blood apparently..hoho..

happy

2007-03-12T04:56:00.000+08:00

please just be happy..

thats all i wanted..

you happy = i happy

i'd give anything to make her happy..even my left balls..NOT!

she wont be happy w me not having ma left balls..

so just be happy, coz i just want you to be happy and smile..coz that smile is priceless..

and i always have a happy time when your happy..its happier than having a happy meal..

and i just cant sleep because your not happy with everything.

everything is bothering you and thats not good at all, coz it makes you not happy...

and i will try my best to change that so that i will get a happy you...

be happy..the world is smiling with you..

be happy..you're white...

be happy..you have me..

and be happy...coz i have you too...

2007-02-28T22:33:00.000+08:00

she's vulgar.
i warned you guys.
cold hard evidence.

2007-02-28T22:15:00.000+08:00

i hv to bounce back...

ego bruised bt its all up to me to decide and sad to say i made the wrong decision this time..

i'l make do w wadever i hv now although my alter ego keep telling me what a loser i am..im gonna kill that bitch sumday...fricken asshole..

i love love..that poor thing hv a horrendous tummy ache, and i felt bad sometimes that i couldnt make her feel better..and i thank her for always making ME feel better.

well, theres the ipod which i named as Poddy, a pleasant surprise of course..advanced burfday prezzie..like wad..2 month in advance? hahaha..bt i dont mind...i want to spend my 21st w my one and only, and that wads matters most...

i need an ego boost badly...pls anything to boost my ego....:(

lets make do w aniting i hv currently..

im starting to hate some of the bloody ooc people..

selfish bastards, dowan to share umbrella w me...BECAUSE I MALAY RITE???? smelly chinois..

on top of that, im having a 8-5 regime, only thing is that, i have to travel across the island to gt to camp..POST ME OUT ALREADYYY!!!

"You are the reason I could fly'
and because of you I dont have to wonder why..."

; D im getting married to Suhaila Said, by hook or by crook...say what you want, you dont feel what i feel, you dont know what i want..heee...

and all this is typed w her rite here by my side...what more could i ask for..me ungrateful good looking piece of thing..pfft...

2007-02-17T01:34:00.000+08:00

"maka terduduk lah mereka di bawah kibaran langit yang di hiasi cahaya gemerlapan sambil mereka menganjak bibit-bibit manis bersama.."

Vogey-wark...braper punya manis daa...wei jack, gua mau story sama lu orang..serious punya bebual ar eh, mmg gua tkder sambot2 ni v-day ni sumer beb..apa mau valentine day beb..wa cuma tau v for vagin-..alamak ni anak-anak sidek buat kacau la..baru mau story r21 sikit..lu orang tu blom cukup umur dik..kencing bagi straight dulu..heran aku budak skrg...kk tkper, wa relek..

itu hari, bersamaan dengan 26 muharram, bersama gelpren gua yg gua sudah fall in lup with, gua lepak ah, pat satu bukit ni...ni bukit susah datang jack..lu orang mau carik pon susah..lu tau boon lay way saner? senang criter jalan bahar la..mau romen lu orang pandai-pandai la carik, suker-suker kaper tanyer2 pat sini..

berbalik pada criter gua yg ter-side track tadi, gua lepak ah dgn si ah lian ni..(sumpah dier bukan minah..) tk tau knaper ar eh, tapi wa rasa syiok ah jack..stim kodok siotz..susah datang aper, duduk bwh bintang lepak2 dgn lu orang nyer minah..

so, itu ajer ah story gua..yg bahawasanya, gua rasa best lepak dgn ah lian gua, pat atas bukit (bukan dalam gua eh..) siap ader champagne wa ckp lu..teringat zaman wa muda2 time racing dgn paolo rossi, part dah jadi champion kn, champagne size XL diorang bagi gua...cukup time itu botol mak gua buat letak kicap..kecoh...

kalao lu orang ader hairan aperhal ni arjuna ader terkehel sikit niari bebual mcm "mat rock bopley tersempal"(skinny jeans ketat sangat dok) , gua bukan aper..tgh feeling mat rock ah dgr lagu search...lu orang tk suker boleh balek la..aper mau kecoh...

dah citer dah bis..cabot!

my day

2007-02-13T00:24:00.000+08:00

the classical music that plays in the toilet at grand parkroyal hotel just now is just so soothing while i happily peed..haha!

had a fantabulous time w my lil sweetie pie this past few weeks...met her at town just now and had the so-long-never-eat Ayam Penyet Ria...after which we window shopped at Paragon and to my disappointment the Ben Sherman's boutique is just wayy to lame..not what i expected, no nice shirts whatsoever..and its damn pricey sia..might as well i shop for Ben Shermans at Heeren where there's this shop which brings in the brand...

then again i settled for a black U2 top.. (damn i sound like some 20 plus shoppaholic who waste her money on clothings and stupid make ups which only make her look like a bloody spinster..hahaha) ok that was random, but anyway this lil cutie of mine had to be her clumsy self and lost balance while we were alighting at Bugis station..so cute la, i feel like slapping her..hahaha!

then met up w Pamiao and Khidhir, and they had ayam penyet at Beach Rd. Apparently Sri Bistari opened a new branch at Beach Rd. One at Changi (which is like the HQ) another at Kampong Melayu and nw, Beach Road. "bisnes up kaper bang..."

we were basically catchin up, with Khidhir ORDing already, Pamiao being an AA (Ambulance Attendant) and me being an Out of Course Personnel at Sispec..hohohoh! Khidhir is currently "blooming" in his t-shirt biz, so people out there who has cash to spend on design T-shirts go on and contact Khidhir..(see darling, im not hating him..im helping a friend..seee!)

pretty gd day "i reckon". and for those of you who are wondering, why am i out of camp on a monday, its because....im on MC (as usual). Since i decided to have a fever after a week long field camp at Tekong, where i spend most of my nights, sleeping in a 5-tonner with shitloads of mosquitoes having a blood buffet.

to top it off, here's a random picture of my handsome atok...

and something to go with this 60's picture..enjoy!

2007-02-02T18:02:00.000+08:00

Hello:
uh huh..

What's up sexy?:
wads up? hoho you dont wanna know..

what do people call you?:
sexy?

what are you wearing?:
something sexy?

how manny candle's did you blow out on
your last birthday?:
she blew me...i mean she blew em for me..the candles..

do you go to school?:
school is for rich people

do/did you like school?:
i dont think so..

I don't, it sucks, so do the people there:
told ya, you dont fit in, you stinkin gaylord

are you listening to anything?:
not really..

awesome, that's so totally awesome:
what are you? a retard?

do you agree with me when I say that
johnny depp is the world' sexiest man?:
2nd sexiest man..

if you did then I love you...but I love
everyone else too:
not interested..

do you have an eating disorder?:
yea, everything i eat goes through my mouth and outta my arse..its the devil i tell you...

do you have aim:
nope, they're too bulky for my liking..

if you do then im me sometime:
i totally understand that dude..please tell me more you filthy animal..

what's the grossest food you've ever eaten:
something i cooked at home econs lab..

do you believe in labels?:
nah they're mere myths..

I don't, they're stupid, you shouldn't
base someone on one word:
i suppose so..

if you do believe in labels then im me
and we'll have a debate:
aaaaaiiitee...

have you ever stayed up all night?:
maybeee...

do you have any brothers?:
brothers are for pussies..

do you have any sisters?:
yea them rascals..

what's your favorite girl's name?:
susu

boy's name?:
pipo

when's the last time you cried?:
im a cybernetic organism living tissue over a metal endoskeleton..i dont cry..

when's the last time you took a shower?:
im a cybernetic organism living tissue over a metal endoskeleton..i dont shower..

what's the best movie in the world?:
i dont remember, bt it has this "cybernetic organism living tissue over a metal endoskeleton" and he said "I'll be back"

what's your favorite quote?:
muker maintain jack..

if some random 5 year old hugged you on
the street, what would do?:
i'm not teddy, lil one...

righty or lefty:
centey..

do you have on socks right now?:
where exactly should they be?

what colors are they?:
white with stains of..i will not go in there..

do you love Frank Sinatra?:
he's a tough lad that old man..

if you don't then go die:
after you..

do you like your name?:
absolutely..

what are your parent's names:
undisclosed.

do you like those names?:
i shall keep it to myself you twerp..

are you bored?:
yes bubblewrap, im bored..

I am:
in love, very much i guess..

without looking guess what time it is:
its time for you to buy a watch...

now look at a clock, what time is it?:
times up..

go tell someone that the cows are
finally coming home:
uh huh

how did they respond?:
they've been waiting for the gd news..

arn't paperclips just so cool?:
paperclips are for pussies..

they serve so many purposes:
my bunk mate choked on em coz he thought they can serve as tic tacs...

do you have a stalker?:
stalkerS.. you mean? yes..they are well paid and is under contract till the end of the season..

what's your biggest fear?:
something big?

mine is spider, I HATE sipders, do you?:
sipders per dok??? dah mabok jgn kecoh dok...

so how is Joey doing?:
lu tutop lu punya mulot ar!! bau siak!!

and what about Rebecca?:
Rebecca kao peh yekkk lar!!!

on a scale of 1-10, how good was this
survey(10 being the best):
1.396476945694568957476569485684684645769
57694769/2387493579439734793753745735345

I'm gonna go now kay?:
please.

uhmm love ya:
who's ya? ur uncle?

bye!:
bhai? singh kaler aper?!!!!! *pinches this irritating mofo*

thats the story of me talking to my imaginary friend..

2007-02-01T22:01:00.001+08:00

try this..

1) just stand still in the open tommorow morning and just take a deep breathe of the air around you..

2)go to your workplace/school or wadever and say this aloud "OMG I ABSOLUTELY LOVE MY FRIGGIN JOB!!"

3)read the newspaper about bombings, accident and shriek, "GOODNESS GRACIOUS! I'M ALIVE!!"

just try it, maybe it will make you feel better..

doesnt work fer me tho..hohoh

its a random post coz im feeling so random that i could list down 10 inert gases from the peridoic table, on 10 pieces of paper and litter em all at 10 different MRT stations.

see what i mean..

to cap it off..a random picture..

2007-01-27T22:34:00.000+08:00

and so it seems that the rain wont stop and the balloon wont be "operational" till the weather condition permits..well at least thats what they say...

and so we had a game of pool and it ended..

they walked away..

but she turned back, waiting..

like something was left behind..rather someone..

that look on her face..

i could hear the words from within her heart..

that lil tinge on her face..

searching and making sure, he's coming along with her and no one else..

its not about me..

not about me feeling wanted..

its not about me having an ego boost..

its you..

about you being the person who turned and making sure i'm following you.

about that look on you..

about that gesture you made which made my day, my week, my month and my year..

its about the lady i wanted so much 5 years ago, this very moment and for the rest of my life...

and just to add an anti climax..

Singapore won on penalties..

i trashed talked about the national team...

but i'm a big fan...hoho!

MALAYSIA BOLEH BALEK LA!!!

errr, anyone up for some ikan bakar in johor next week?

2007-01-15T11:07:00.000+08:00

been sumtime aite...

yep, i went out of course, have a lil relaxing life now...
more time, more saikang bt who cares..
i dont give a shit anymore...
all i know, i dont have to go through that shitty training anymore..

to hell with pride and what have yous...

im just hangin around sispec for god-knows hw long waiting for my posting which i do not know when or where...

might even get a PES downgrade from a combat fit PES A to maybe, a C2L2..i dont know..

lets just wait and see..4 months in my NS life and i still dont understand hw the army nor its people work...

one of the few times im blogging on a macbook, listening to guns'n'roses November Rain while waiting to have lunch w me missus...

this is bliss..having to spend glorious time w her..

not to mention i get to meddle w her spanking new macbk, which have this cam tingy..hohohoh!

she's been a darling..spending the evening watching Everybody Loves Raymond and munching shitloads of food is fun w a capital U...hahhaha!

Who says Pes C guys arent fit..hahahaha!

sorry dear, i had to camwhore w ur lil mac cam..hahahaz!

gd ting the army didnt take my camwhoring persona away..ahahaha! oh pls nigga...

"so nevermind the darkness we still can find a way, coz nothing last forever even cold november rain..."

2007-01-02T00:41:00.000+08:00

"I dont have the heart for this anymore..."

"Why am I here again?"

"How come they got the slack vocations?"

"Wait this is not me, but why am I like this??"

"I don't want to do this please!!!"

"Urghhh not again..."

I've made up my mind and I will execute whatever that I have in mind...

Its not my nature to give up, but sometimes, you just got to do what your heart tells you to...

You've been such a darling, encouraging me, pushing me on and giving me all sorts of support in my time of need. Everytime I go through shit, its the thought of you that keeps me going..That smile of yours, those snow white cheeks and the warmth just by the very existence of yours..You are truely irreplaceable and I don't know what I'd do without you...

For your're my one and only...

Always....